Do you wake baby up for dream feed
What Is Dream Feeding? And How Do I Dream Feed? – Happiest Baby
By Dr. Harvey Karp, MD, FAAP
On This Page
- Dream Feeding: What It Is
- How to Dream Feed
- How to Get Your Baby Back to Sleep
- Dream Feeding Tips
- Dream Feeding Benefits
- Adding a Second Dream Feed
- When to Stop Dream Feeds
- Final Thoughts on Dream Feeds
Newborn babies eat a lot. Breastfed infants eat about every two to three hours and formula-fed babies hit the bottle every three to four hours…and that doesn’t stop when bedtime calls. In fact, bottle-fed babies often continue night feedings until they’re around 6 months old, whereas breastfed babies may continue up to a year. But that doesn’t mean that there’s nothing you can do to tame night-waking. If your little one wakes up hungry each night, it’s smart to increase daytime milk (research shows that infants who received more milk or solid feeds during the day are less likely to feed at night) and boost their evening calories by way of a dream feed. Think of a dream feed as topping off your car’s gas tank...so there's no need to refuel during the journey ahead. Offering your baby a dream feed will eliminate—or at least delay—one of the top reasons babies wake through the night: a rumbling tummy.
What is dream feeding?Dream feeding is when you rouse your baby—without fully waking them up—to feed them one more time before you turn in for the night. Babies who go to sleep between 6pm and 8pm often wake out of hunger in the middle of the night. But research has shown that sneaking in an extra feed between 10pm and midnight can reduce night wakings, helping babies stay asleep until a more “reasonable” time of the morning. This can become part of your little one’s regular sleep schedule.
How do I dream feed?The goal of a dream feed is to offer your little one more meal before you hit the hay, so that you and your baby’s schedule sync better…and you both sleep better. Ready to try it? Follow these steps:
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Step 1: Gently take your baby out of the bassinet or crib between 10pm and 12am, or whenever when you go to bed. Keep the room dim and quiet, except for white noise. Doing this during Baby’s more active REM sleep is ideal. During REM sleep your baby may flutter their eyelids, make little squeaks and squawks, or move around more than usual.
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Step 2: Keep your baby swaddled. There’s no need to unswaddle—or change your baby’s diaper—if they’ll take the feed that way and their diaper isn’t soiled. (If your baby is super sleepy, you may need to rouse them a bit by gently tickling their toes.)
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Step 3: Touch Baby’s cheek with your breast or bottle. Placing your breast or bottle on your baby's cheek or lower lip will wake up their rooting reflex and get your baby to start eating.
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Step 4: Offer a brief feed. Encourage nursing for 5 to 10 minutes on each side. For bottle-fed babies, try for about 3 ounces.
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Step 5: Burp your baby. Many parents ask: Do you burp a baby after a dream feed? and the answer is always yes. You want to burp a baby after a dream feed—or any feed—before putting them back down on their back.
Oftentimes, a baby who has just enjoyed a dream feed can be returned to their bassinet with nary a wakeup. But if your little one has woken up during or after a dream feed, you can get them back down with the help of the 5 S’s: Swaddling, Side/Stomach, Shushing, Swinging, Sucking.
First, if you haven’t already, swaddle your baby and put on some rumbly white noise. I recommend playing white noise all night, but you can turn up the volume as you’re putting your baby back down. The most effective white noise for sleep is continuous, monotonous, and at a low-pitch, like my SNOO sounds download or SNOObear, Happiest Baby’s white noise lovey.
At the same time, gentle rhythmic motion can help lull babies to sleep. In fact, a 2019 study in the journal PLOS ONE found that the magical mix of swaddling, white noise, and rocking “evokes an immediate calming response” when caregivers soothe their infants and when they use SNOO, my responsive bassinet. SNOO uses womb-like white noise and motion (and a built-in swaddle!) to quickly settle babies back to sleep after a feed…usually adding sleep for the whole family.
Other time-tested tricks to help a baby sleep after a dream feed include rocking in a rocking chair, walking with your baby in your arms, bouncing on an exercise ball, and offering a pacifier, which fulfills the Sucking portion of the 5 S’s. As an added bonus, research suggests a bedtime paci helps lower the risk of sudden infant sleep death, or SIDS.
As you put your little one back into their bassinet, do my quick wake-and-sleep trick, which teaches your baby to fall asleep on their own. Here’s the gist: Right after you put your baby down, gently rouse them with a gentle tickle on their feet until they barely open their eyes. After a few seconds, they’ll close their eyes again and slide back to sleep. If your little one fusses, pick them up for a feed or a cuddle, then repeat the gentle-tickle-to-wake routine.
Set your baby up for dream feed success:As I mentioned earlier, the one-two punch of adding daytime calories and dream feeds can really work wonders to help babies sleep longer. Try offering cluster feeds from about 4pm till bedtime. Cluster feeds are a series of quick milky meals given to Baby every one to two hours. They’re meant to load your little one’s system with calories to keep them well stocked with nutrition through the night. At the same time, put your little one down for night-night safely swaddled with your trusted white noise on. Consider this another “dream team” to help Baby sleep better!
Why dream feeds are great for your infant:A wonderful thing about dream feeding is that doesn’t interfere with your little one’s need to feed at night. Instead, dream feeding simply shifts your baby’s feeding schedule just a bit so that it’s more conducive to your sleep schedule, too. Plus, dream feeding means that…
- Your baby will get the extra calories they need to sleep better.
- Your baby is eating a meal at a convenient time, so you can sleep longer, too.
- You’re not responding to your baby’s crying with food, which is important because reacting to cries with a feed can inadvertently encourage your baby to eat more at night.
- Your baby will eat less during the night and therefore be hungrier in the morning, which will boost daytime eating.
If your baby frequently wakes around 3:30am despite having an earlier dream feed and using strong, rumbly white noise, consider setting your alarm and giving one more dream feed at 3am. Again, it’s best to keep the lights dim and to not talk or cuddle too much at this hour. You want to be loving when you feed your baby, but you don’t want your little one to think that it’s time to play! The idea is to pick up and feed your little one before they wake you, so you’re giving your baby the nourishment they need, but not rewarding them for waking and crying.
If you must do this early-morning dream feed, every three days, reduce the 3am feed a bit more by giving a little less milk than usual. If you’re nursing, just feed on one side for the second dream feed. If you’re bottle-feeding, you can try doubling the amount of water the formula directions suggest—for just ONE feeding and ONLY for a couple days. This is very important: It’s dangerous to dilute baby formula for meals. It can cause serious health problems. Diluting for this ONE wee-hour feed for a brief period of time is different. The purpose of the extra water is to fill your baby’s stomach with enough ounces, but fewer calories. This can help babies sleep through to morning…when they will be hungry and ready to eat their full bottle again. Again, this is a temporary fix only to be used for the 3am dream feed—and only for a couple of nights.
When should I stop dream feeding?All babies are different, so there is no specific age recommendation for stopping a dream feed. My general rule is that you can bid adieu to the dream feed 2 to 4 weeks after your baby is sleeping well from the time of your dream feed on through to the morning. (Learn when your baby might start sleeping through the night.) Of course, if the dream feed isn’t working for you, there’s no need to continue!
Final Thoughts on the Dream Feed and Other Sleep TipsOffering a dream feed to your snoozing baby before you declare “lights out” may give you a chance to catch more precious ZZZs, which, of course, is fantastic! Giving a dream feed can also help train your sweet pea to stay asleep for longer stretches…and that skill can carry over to better night sleeps down the road, too. Beyond dream feeding, if your newborn baby is having difficulty sleeping, you may need a little extra help lulling them to dreamland. This is where I hope SNOO can help exhausted families by automatically soothing fussing with gentle rocking and white noise. You can learn more about SNOO and find other great sleep resources below:
- SNOO Success Stories
- All About Your Baby’s Wake Windows
- What to Do When Your Baby Won't Sleep in a Bassinet
- How to Turn On Baby’s “On Switch” for Sleep
- Sleep Regression 101
About Dr. Harvey Karp
Dr. Harvey Karp, one of America’s most trusted pediatricians, is the founder of Happiest Baby and the inventor of the groundbreaking SNOO Smart Sleeper. After years of treating patients in Los Angeles, Dr. Karp vaulted to global prominence with the release of the bestselling Happiest Baby on the Block and Happiest Toddler on the Block. His celebrated books and videos have since become standard pediatric practice, translated into more than 20 languages and have helped millions of parents. Dr. Karp’s landmark methods, including the 5 S’s for soothing babies, guide parents to understand and nurture their children and relieve stressful issues, like new-parent exhaustion, infant crying, and toddler tantrums.
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Disclaimer: The information on our site is NOT medical advice for any specific person or condition. It is only meant as general information. If you have any medical questions and concerns about your child or yourself, please contact your health provider.
Dream feeding: How to dream feed your baby
Updated Feb 17, 2023
Maybe you have heard the term “dream feed” from a friend, in one of the many sleep training articles you have read (ever heard of the Ferber method or the Cry-it-out method?), or in your favorite parenting group. Wherever you were first introduced to the commonly used strategy to encourage fewer night wakings, we bet you still have some questions!
We’re glad you’re curious and are excited to help you better understand dream nursing or bottle feeding and how filling up your baby’s tummy just before their longest sleep can help everyone get a better night’s rest.
IN THIS ARTICLE:
What is a dream feed?
At what age can you dream feed?
Dream feed by age chart
When is the best time to stop the dream feed?
How do I dream feed?
Dream feed schedule (example)
Dream feed FAQs
What is a dream feed?
To put it simply, it’s a sleepy nursing or bottle feeding session given to your baby in the late evening (hours after they’ve already gone to sleep at bedtime), usually just before you go to sleep yourself. This practice of waking your baby to eat can help parents sync the longest stretch of their baby’s night sleep with their own. The idea is to shift your baby’s normal feeding time a bit earlier, and it works best for babies who wake at night due to hunger.
Note that offering breast milk or formula at this time typically won’t help improve sleep if a child is waking due to a sleep onset association rather than hunger. For example, if an infant older than 4 months will only fall asleep while being fed at bedtime, they will more likely need to be fed back to sleep when waking in the night between sleep cycles, even if they aren’t hungry. Offering a twilight feed in a case like this is unlikely to improve your baby’s sleep.
At what age can you dream feed?
Great question! Parents around the world first introduce this twilight feed at various times. It is never too soon to introduce a sleep feeding into your baby’s schedule, although some prefer to wait until their baby graduates from the newborn phase. Dream feeding is most used for babies between 6 weeks and 10 months old.
While many older breastfed babies (who are also consuming solids) are capable of going 10 - 12 hours overnight without a feeding, some simply are not. The age at which a baby can go all night without a feeding depends on several factors. While most 10 month olds are ready or will be ready, to fully wean at night, some babies may continue to need at least 1 feeding overnight until closer to 12 months.
Let’s take a look at the optimal ages to dream nurse or bottle feed.
Dream feed by age chart
Dream feed by Age | Why it is the optimal age |
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Dream feed at 6 weeks old | 6 weeks is a great time to add a sleepy feed to your baby’s feeding schedule. Around 6 weeks, many babies have just come out of their 4- to 6-week growth spurt and begin showing signs that they are ready to sleep for longer periods overnight. |
Dream feed at 3 months old | 3 months is a very popular age to add a last feed before midnight. By 12 weeks, many babies can go one stretch of about 3 - 4 hours (or longer) without a feeding. Adding a dream nursing or bottle feeding a couple hours before midnight may help your baby sleep until 1 or 2 AM. |
Dream feed at 4 months old | 4 months may be the most popular age to begin dream feeding. Between 4 and 6 months, babies will often experience another growth spurt and naturally show signs of needing an extra night feeding (even if they previously dropped an overnight feed). If this sounds like your baby, sleep feeding may be the answer! |
Dream feed at 6 months old | 6 months is another ideal time to resume or begin. At around 6 months, babies’ bedtimes typically get earlier, leaving more time for nighttime sleep. Feeding your baby again a few hours after they have gone to sleep for the night can be the “magic trick” that gives you and your baby peaceful sleep until the early morning hours. |
Dream feed at 10 months old | Some 10 month old babies, who are still waking to feed at night, can also benefit from a last feed around 9 or 10 PM. A well-timed dream feeding at this age helps some babies sleep until it is time to wake up for the day. However, do note that a dream feed can interrupt a baby’s natural sleep cycle, and they may continue to wake in the early morning hours. Older babies may sleep better with one feeding between 3:00 and 5:00 AM rather than a dream feed. |
When is the best time to stop the dream feed?
Babies will not need a dream feed forever. The best time to stop or drop it depends on a few things. At Huckleberry, we take into consideration:
Your baby’s primary feeding method (i.e., breastfeeding, bottle feeding, combination feeding, and if solids have been introduced)
Calorie intake during the day
How ready you are to stop the feeding
Whether your baby is waking from true hunger or a sleep onset association
How helpful the feeding is to your baby’s sleep schedule and ability to sleep longer as a result of a late-night last feed
How do I dream feed?
Now that you know what this sleepy feed is, what age you can offer this feed, and the best time to stop, let’s help you learn how to dream feed your baby.
Step 1. Rouse the baby.
After your baby has been sleeping for 1 - 3 hours, you will want to gently wake up your baby. Many families ask us, “How awake should my baby be for the dream feeding?” Ideally, you want your baby to remain drowsy and awake just enough to take a full feeding.
Pro Tips:
Keep the lights off or very dim.
Be boring! Try not to talk, move around, or make a lot of noise.
Be mindful as you pick up your baby from the crib or bassinet. Slow and steady movements help keep you and your baby safe and reduce the chances of waking them fully.
Step 2. Get ready to feed.
How long or how much to feed your baby at this final feed of the night varies. Breastfed babies may need to nurse for just a few minutes (e.g., 5 - 10 minutes) or half an hour. There is no magic twilight feed duration that applies to every breastfeeding mom and baby. Bottle-fed babies, like breastfed babies, will require differing amounts, depending on their age, size, and how recently they last ate.
Step 3. Put the baby back to sleep.
After the feed, your goal is to put your sweet one back in their sleep space without them waking up fully. This can be tricky, but with practice and patience, it can be done!
Use slow/steady movements to gently lay your baby back down to sleep. If your baby wakes fully, ideally, they will fall back to sleep in the same way that they fell asleep at the beginning of the night. Follow safer sleep guidelines by laying your baby down on their back.
Let’s not forget burping!
Not every baby is a “big burper” or needs to burp following every feed. You know your baby best; if your baby tends to need a burp after finishing a feed, be sure to get one before laying your baby back in the crib or bassinet.
Bonus round! The double dream feed…
You read that right. Some parents double down on the dream nursing or bottle. The double feed is when you purposefully offer your baby two sleepy feedings in the evening, roughly 2 hours apart, with the final feed occurring close to midnight.
Dream feed weaning
Once a family is ready, they can stop waking their baby for the feedings and let them wake naturally when they need to eat. Another option is to offer a little less milk or formula each night. For example, parents can gradually lessen the time spent nursing by a few minutes or reduce the formula in the bottle by 1 - 2 ounces.
Dream feed schedule
Here is an example of a dream nursing or bottle schedule.
6:30 PM Bedtime feeding
7:30 PM Bedtime
9:30 PM Parent rouses baby for dream feeding
10:00 PM Baby is back to sleep
1:30 AM Baby wakes for night feeding
4:30 AM Baby wakes for night feeding
7:30 AM Wake up
Pros and cons of dream feeds
Pros of dream feed | Cons of dream feed |
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Encourages longer stretch of sleep overnight | Family may prefer a more organic feeding schedule |
Helps parents feel more rested | Baby may be difficult to wake for feed |
Protective of milk supply | Baby may wake up fully and need help going back to sleep. Babies helped back to sleep may develop (or maintain) a helped-to-sleep association which can lead to increased night waking. |
Helps baby receive adequate calories | Parents may prefer an earlier bedtime for themselves |
Promotes a more predictable schedule | Requires planning and forethought |
Dream Feed FAQs
Q: Is a dream feed right for us?
A:
For babies 10 months or younger who are waking from hunger (which can also manifest as early risings), you might consider offering a dream feed to lengthen their stretches of nighttime sleep.
Q: Is a dream feed guaranteed to work?
A:
Dream feeds help some families get more sleep, while others don’t find them very useful. We find that dream feeds won’t help babies sleep better if they are waking for reasons unrelated to hunger, such as a sleep onset association or schedule issues. You can always give it a try for a few nights to see if it will work for your family.
Q: When is the ideal time to offer a dream feed?
A:
The ideal time to offer a dream feed is before the parent’s bedtime, typically between 10 PM and midnight.
Q: Will offering a dream feed lower my milk supply?
A:
Feeding your baby again in the late-night hours sends the signal to your body to produce more breast milk and can promote an increase in milk production.
Q: My baby has reflux, can I still dream feed?
A:
Babies with reflux may need to be held upright for 10 - 30 minutes after a feeding. If your baby requires upright time after feedings, be sure to factor in this extra time when planning your night feeding schedule with a dream feed.
Q: Can I dream feed with formula?
A:
A sleep feeding can be done with breast milk or formula.
Q: Should I wake my baby to feed at night?
A:
Waking a baby for a dream nursing or bottle feeding right before the parent’s bedtime can sometimes lengthen night sleep for the entire family. This can be particularly helpful if a baby is waking at night from hunger. However, waking a baby to feed at night won’t typically help extend sleep if a child is waking for other reasons (such as a sleep onset association).
Q: Can dream feeding cause early waking?
A:
A feeding before the parent’s bedtime won’t typically be the cause of an early morning waking habit. However, some babies will continue to wake during the early morning hours to feed, even if they are offered a twilight feed.
Q: Can a dream feed reduce night wakings?
A:
Yes, in some cases, offering an additional night feeding before the parent’s bedtime can extend sleep. Offering breast milk or formula at this time tends to be most helpful if the child would otherwise wake from hunger in the middle of the night.
How to wake up a baby for feeding and whether it is necessary to wake up a baby in the afternoon
05/29/2020
95
For any parent, the question of whether to wake up the baby is not easy. On the one hand, there are fears that a child who has been sleeping for a long time will not be able to fall asleep later, and on the other hand, how to raise such an angel who has been put to bed for so long...
so that his sleep is not affected.
Let's start with the smallest children. You've probably heard the phrase "never wake a sleeping baby." But it is not always fair. Some newborn babies wake up on their own for feedings, while others need to be awakened. Whether or not you need to wake your baby depends on their age, weight, and overall health.
The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends waking your baby for feedings if he sleeps more than 4 hours in the first two weeks of life. On average, a baby needs feeding every 2-3 hours.
Frequent feeding is very important for several reasons:
- The baby's stomach is very small, the baby quickly digests breast milk. Faster than a mix. Therefore, physiologically, the child necessarily needs frequent feedings every 2-3 hours.
- Babies can sometimes sleep even when hungry, thus malnourished, which affects their development.
- After birth, the baby loses 5-10% of its body weight. And in the first weeks he needs to gain weight. Lack of milk or formula slows down this process.
- A short interval between feedings helps to maintain lactation. That allows you to avoid problems with a lack of milk in the future.
Tears already signal strong hunger. Therefore, it is better to breastfeed the baby before the baby starts crying. Learn to recognize the early signs of hunger: the baby puts his hand in his mouth, smacks his lips, tossing and turning when he sleeps.
Should the baby be woken up to feed during the day? In general, if an infant sleeps for more than 3 hours in one dream during daylight hours, he must be awakened. Then the mother can feed the already awakened baby. This makes it possible to adjust the work of the biological rhythms of the baby.
How to Wake Up
- Help your child gradually fall asleep by stroking their arms, legs or lightly tickling them.
- Change diaper. Often this is enough for the baby to wake up and be ready to eat.
- Undress and place skin to skin on your chest. You can squeeze a few drops of milk onto your baby's mouth. He will smell and taste it and begin to suck on the breast.
- Speak - he will hear your voice and wake up.
- Do not turn on bright lights. A dim light is sufficient. The bright light will blind your eyes.
- If the baby has attached to the breast but has not begun to suckle, stroke his cheek.
How long to feed
As soon as the baby wakes up and starts to eat, make sure that the feeding is long enough to empty at least one breast. So we will know that he ate hind milk, which is necessary for the growth of the child's body. Some babies take 45 minutes or more to feed one breast, and some do it in 10 minutes.
The sucking reflex promotes falling asleep. Therefore, make sure that the baby does not fall asleep while feeding. If he falls asleep, change position, lift him up to burp, and then start feeding again.
By 6 months you will have a more or less predictable eating schedule. But each baby will have his own. Some of the children eat every 2 hours, and someone is able to stay without food for 3-4 hours by the second month of life. This is especially true for children who are formula fed.
The length of time between feedings increases as the child grows older. By the age of six months, many babies can already go without supplements at night or are able to sleep for longer periods.
If a child wakes up too often after 6 months and asks for food at night, perhaps this is no longer hunger, but a way to relax and fall asleep.
Avoid using a pacifier in the first weeks after delivery. The pacifier helps the child to calm down and prolong sleep. So you may not notice that your baby is hungry. Therefore, start using a pacifier no earlier than 4-6 weeks and when you are lactating.
Should the baby be woken up to feed formula? As with breastfeeding, the newborn needs frequent formula feeding. But the interval will be more than 3-4 hours.
When it is necessary to wake up the child
It is important to wake up the baby in the morning if he has fallen asleep later than 7.00. This is especially true for children who still sleep 1-2-3 times during the day and have already developed a relatively stable routine. So you create the perfect routine in the morning.
After waking up, children need time to work up their fatigue for their next nap, the ideal window for which is around 9 and 1 pm (depending on age).
Therefore, if the baby slept until 8 am, he simply will not be able to fall asleep in his first daytime sleep.
In order for the baby to wake up calmly without tears, you can enter a wake-up ritual. It allows the child to smoothly transition from a sleepy state to wakefulness.
Example of a wake-up ritual:
- Open curtains/turn on lights
- Welcome words and a kiss
- Snacks, nursery rhymes after sleep
- Happy song
Then you can get up and start breakfast. For older children, such a ritual is also necessary.
The awakening ritual has different purposes:
- Marks the end of sleep,
- Teaches a child that everyday sounds are not a reason to wake up,
- Helps prevent baby from crying when waking up.
It will also be useful to have a light alarm. If the baby wakes up early, he will stay in bed until he sees the light on the clock.
When to wake your baby up after a nap
Many babies from 4 to 8 months sleep three times a day.
In this mode, it is important to wake up the baby after the third nap no later than 17.00. The duration of this segment is about 45 minutes, but not more than an hour. Then you can easily put the baby to bed by 19 o'clock.
Transition to one nap
At the age of 15-18 months there is a transition to one nap. It can be long and take place in different ways.
For example:
In the morning, the baby falls asleep easily and sleeps up to 2 hours. But then it is difficult to put it in lunch. And by the evening without rest at lunchtime, he is already overworked and falls asleep with difficulty.
So if this is your case, you can pick up the baby after 60-75 minutes. At the same time, move the start of the second sleep 15 minutes later. But if the baby sleeps for 1 hour in the morning and then it’s already difficult to fall asleep a second time, start putting him down only at lunchtime.
One nap after 2 years
Between 2.5-5 years, naps may disappear. Here again, the story described above is often repeated. It seems that the child falls asleep perfectly during the day, sleeps for a long time, but in the evening, laying down is delayed until 10-11 pm. The problem is that getting up early in the morning to the garden usually does not allow you to sleep the necessary 10-11 hours per night. And again, you will have to gradually limit the duration of daytime rest. Wake your baby up after 60 minutes first, then skip the daytime so your baby sleeps better at night.
Keep an eye on your baby while doing this. If he is calm in the evening and falls asleep easily, and wakes up later than 6 o'clock in the morning in a good mood, then you are doing everything correctly.
If you notice excessive moodiness in the late afternoon or regular awakenings too early, then it is worth giving the baby more time to rest at lunchtime.
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What can I do to make my baby sleep well from birth?
04/29/2019
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How to establish a dream
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ANNA ROSTOVA
Anna Rostova
Top Consultant for Snip, Consultant for GV
22222 Mom of a son
You are expecting a baby and imagine a baby sleeping peacefully in your crib. But you already know that this sweet picture does not always become a reality. In this article, you'll find everything you need to know about baby sleep so you're ready for surprises.
0–4 months. Improve sleep in 3 weeks
How a newborn sleeps
In the first months after birth, the baby often wakes up and sleeps in short periods of time. This is due to the need for frequent feedings. The volume of the stomach of a newborn is very small, in 1 month it holds only 80-150 ml. This does not allow the child to go without feeding for a long time. But that is not all.
- The baby has not yet formed a circadian rhythm, and therefore the child alternates periods of sleep and wakefulness, regardless of the time of day.
- Newborns are characterized by a very short waking time, no more than 45–60 minutes. This often leads to overexcitation and crying of the child.
- It is difficult for a small child to maintain the regime by the hour. Until about 10 months, we talk about the rhythm of sleep and wakefulness. This means that the time of morning awakening and the duration of daytime sleep determine the time of subsequent dreams. This is where the main difficulty arises - it is difficult for parents to plan a day.
- The baby's nervous system is characterized by the immaturity of inhibitory neurons, so excitatory processes predominate, which means that the child needs time and the help of adults to calm down before going to bed.
What problems with the baby's sleep can occur during this period?
The child “mixed up” day and night
During the day he sleeps a lot and well, but at night he stays awake for a long time and requires the attention of tired parents. The fact is that the baby does not yet have a “biological clock”. He just has to learn to distinguish between "day" and "night." To avoid problems with this, you need to show the baby the difference between day and night from birth:
- During the day, while awake, “flood” the baby with light: turn on bright lights, open the curtains, play by the window, walk on the street. And at night, try not to turn on the light, do not take the baby out when waking up in a lighted room. If necessary, use a low-light nightlight. Try not to talk loudly or play with your baby when you wake up.
- Watch not only the time of wakefulness, but also the duration of daytime sleep. It is desirable that the child in the first month of life does not sleep continuously during the day for more than 3 hours, and from the second month - more than 2-2.5 hours.
- If the baby sleeps longer during the day, create conditions for waking up: open the curtains, turn on the lights, listen to soft music, make normal daytime noises, speak in a loud voice (for example, on the phone). If this does not help, stroke the baby's arms and legs.
Baby wakes up with hands but doesn't like to be swaddled
Scientific studies based on polysomnography data have shown that swaddling does indeed help to reduce baby's movement-related awakenings, primarily by increasing the continuity of restful sleep. But what if your baby cries when you swaddle him?
- Swaddle him a little earlier than you usually do. Resistance to swaddling is often due to the fact that the baby has already gone too far and is too excited.
- Try Australian swaddling, which keeps your baby's arms close to their face and they can soothe themselves with fist sucking.
- Instead of a regular diaper, you can use a special envelope with Velcro or a zipper. This makes the swaddling process very easy.
The child is restless in the evening and cries a lot
In the evening, babies may accumulate fatigue, which is expressed in restless behavior at the chest, irritability and increased activity. According to Professor Mark Weissbluth, a world-famous specialist in children's sleep, the peak of anxiety in babies is observed at about 5-6 weeks of age.
Things to help reduce your child's anxiety:
- Control your wake time. Try not to exceed 1 hour up to 4-5 weeks, and 2 hours up to 4 months.
- Organize a little preparation for sleep: dim the lights, swaddle the baby, carry him in your arms, talk in a low voice, try to relax him.
- Do you have guests who want to play with the baby? Ask them to come in early and choose quieter games, explaining how important it is for the child before bed.
- Do not use noisy and luminous toys in the evening.
- Use the Harvey Karp system to soothe a crying baby.
The baby falls asleep on the breast
The sucking reflex manifests itself in a child in the first hours of life, and the need for sucking begins to fade only closer to 2 years. Sucking, in addition to providing the baby with food, also relaxes him, has a calming effect on the child. Therefore, many newborns fall asleep during feeding, and the high need for suckling in the first months of life makes this process natural.
To prevent falling asleep on your chest from becoming an association that interferes with good sleep, try alternative ways to fall asleep:
- Offer different relaxation options: for example, stroking the arms and legs, white noise, lullaby.
- On calm days, give your baby the opportunity to fall asleep by himself, creating the necessary conditions for falling asleep.
- Don't be afraid to let your baby soothe herself by sucking on her fist. Studies have shown that children who suck their fingers have a longer uninterrupted stretch of sleep at night and fewer awakenings.
- If you are thinking about a pacifier, read the article about the features of its use.
Baby has short naps
Short naps are normal until about 8-10 months of age. It is desirable that during the day there is at least one nap lasting more than 1 hour. If your baby has not yet learned to sleep long enough, you can help him:
- Eliminate physical discomfort. The child may wake up due to hunger, thirst, an overflowing diaper, pain.
- Analyze the baby's wake time - is it too long for his age? Excessive excitement leads to an increase in the level of cortisol - a stress hormone that does not allow you to relax in order to sleep peacefully and for a long time.
- Recreate conditions for sleep similar to the sensations in the uterus: swaddle the baby, turn on white noise, dim the lights.
- Help your child make the transition from one sleep cycle to another by placing a hand on their chest or shoulder, holding the arms as they are raised.
- Prolong sleep by recreating the usual association for sleep - give a breast or pump up a baby.
- Try to master the sling - contact with mom, her smell and movement will make sleep more restful and longer.
And when can mom have a rest?
- Relax during the day with your baby - do not try to do all the housework while the child is sleeping.
- Try to go to bed early in the evening. Ideally, at the same time as the child.
- Don't be afraid to ask family and friends for help. They will be happy to be of service to you. The father of the child can buy groceries, the grandmother can iron the clothes, the girlfriend can cook dinner.
- You can "buy" free time - if possible, use the services of cleaning, cooking, food delivery.
- Make the most of household devices: a vegetable cutter, a slow cooker, a robot vacuum cleaner, a dishwasher and other “helpers” will significantly save mom’s time and effort.
- Cook for now only simple dishes that do not require much effort. Use semi-finished products, freeze food for future use.
- Take note of inventions that help your baby sleep.
- Try to give yourself at least 1 hour a day when you can be away from home without a child: go to the store, have tea with a friend, just take a quiet walk.
- Find an activity that gives you strength and lifts your spirits. Reading, embroidery, floriculture, online shopping, sports, decoupage - anything! It is enough to devote 15-20 minutes a day to this to feel better.
- Lower the bar for household chores for a while. Try to determine the minimum that allows you to feel good and not feel guilty.
- If you feel like you're fighting for sleep—your child and yours—speak to a sleep consultant.
- Promote the production of dopamine - the hormone of joy that gives you a good mood. Record your small accomplishments throughout the day. Maybe today you were better at swaddling or calming your baby quickly. Maybe you were able to find time to prepare your favorite salad. Every little achievement will lift your spirits!
Sources:
[1] BregjeEvanSleuwen, AdèleCEngelberts, MagdaMBoere-Boonekamp, WietseKuis, TomWJSchulpen, MoniqueP. L'HoirSwaddling: ASystematicReview // Pediatrics. 2007; Vol. 120 no. 4, e1097-106.