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Baby

Grow baby, grow! From natural baby foods to baby-led weaning, here’s what you need to know about feeding baby well.

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Breastfeeding vs.

Formula Feeding (for Parents)

Choosing whether to breastfeed or formula feed their baby is one of the biggest decisions expectant and new parents will make.

Healt experts believe breast milk is the best nutritional choice for infants. But breastfeeding may not be possible for all women. For many, the decision to breastfeed or formula feed is based on their comfort level, lifestyle, and specific medical situations.

For moms who can't breastfeed or who decide not to, infant formula is a healthy alternative. Formula provides babies with the nutrients they need to grow and thrive.

Some mothers worry that if they don't breastfeed, they won't bond with their baby. But the truth is, loving mothers will always create a special bond with their children. And feeding — no matter how — is a great time to strengthen that bond.

The decision to breastfeed or formula feed your baby is a personal one. Weighing the pros and cons of each method can help you decide what is best for you and your baby.

All About Breastfeeding

Nursing can be a wonderful experience for both mother and baby. It provides ideal nourishment and a special bonding experience that many mothers cherish.

A number of health organizations — including the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP), the American Medical Association (AMA), and the World Health Organization (WHO) — recommend breastfeeding as the best choice for babies. Breastfeeding helps defend against infections, prevent allergies, and protect against a number of chronic conditions.

The AAP recommends that babies be breastfed exclusively for the first 6 months. Beyond that, breastfeeding is encouraged until at least 12 months, and longer if both the mother and baby are willing.

Here are some of the many benefits of breastfeeding:

Fighting infections and other conditions. Breastfed babies have fewer infections and hospitalizations than formula-fed infants. During breastfeeding, antibodies and other germ-fighting factors pass from a mother to her baby and strengthen the immune system. This helps lower a baby's chances of getting many infections, including:

  • ear infections
  • diarrhea
  • respiratory infections
  • meningitis

Breastfeeding also may protect babies against:

  • allergies
  • asthma
  • diabetes
  • obesity
  • sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS)

Breastfeeding is particularly beneficial for premature babies.

Nutrition and ease of digestion. Often called the "perfect food" for a human baby's digestive system, breast milk's components — lactose, protein (whey and casein), and fat — are easily digested by a newborn.

As a group, breastfed infants have less difficulty with digestion than do formula-fed infants. Breast milk tends to be more easily digested so that breastfed babies have fewer bouts of diarrhea or constipation.

Breast milk also naturally contains many of the vitamins and minerals that a newborn requires. One exception is vitamin D — the AAP recommends that all breastfed babies begin receiving vitamin D supplements during the first 2 months and continuing until a baby consumes enough vitamin D-fortified formula or milk (after 1 year of age).

The U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) regulates formula companies to ensure they provide all the necessary nutrients (including vitamin D) in their formulas. Still, commercial formulas can't completely match breast milk's exact composition. Why? Because milk is a living substance made by each mother for her individual infant, a process that can't be duplicated in a factory.

Free. Breast milk doesn't cost a cent, while the cost of formula quickly adds up. And unless you're pumping breast milk and giving it to your baby, there's no need for bottles, nipples, and other supplies that can be costly. Since breastfed babies are less likely to be sick, that may mean they make fewer trips to the doctor's office, so fewer co-pays and less money are paid for prescriptions and over-the-counter medicines.

Different tastes. Nursing mothers usually need 300 to 500 extra calories per day, which should come from a wide variety of well-balanced foods. This introduces breastfed babies to different tastes through their mothers' breast milk, which has different flavors depending on what their mothers have eaten. By tasting the foods of their "culture," breastfed infants more easily accept solid foods.

Convenience. With no last-minute runs to the store for more formula, breast milk is always fresh and available whether you're home or out and about. And when women breastfeed, there's no need to wash bottles and nipples or warm up bottles in the middle of the night.

Smarter babies. Some studies suggest that children who were exclusively breastfed have slightly higher IQs than children who were formula fed.

"Skin-to-skin" contact. Many nursing mothers really enjoy the experience of bonding so closely with their babies. And the skin-to-skin contact can enhance the emotional connection between mother and infant.

Beneficial for mom, too. The ability to totally nourish a baby can help a new mother feel confident in her ability to care for her baby. Breastfeeding also burns calories and helps shrink the uterus, so nursing moms may be able to return to their pre-pregnancy shape and weight quicker. Also, studies show that breastfeeding helps lower the risk of breast cancer, high blood pressure, diabetes, and cardiovascular disease, and also may help decrease the risk of uterine and ovarian cancer.

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Breastfeeding Challenges

Breastfeeding can be easy from the get-go for some mothers, but take a while to get used to for others. Moms and babies need plenty of patience to get used to the routine of breastfeeding.

Common concerns of new moms, especially during the first few weeks and months, may include:

Personal comfort. Initially, many moms feel uncomfortable with breastfeeding. But with proper education, support, and practice, most moms overcome this.

Latch-on pain is normal for the first week to 10 days, and should last less than a minute with each feeding. But if breastfeeding hurts throughout feedings, or if their nipples and/or breasts are sore, it's a good idea for breastfeeding mothers to get help from a lactation consultant or their doctor. Many times, it's just a matter of using the proper technique, but sometimes pain can mean that something else is going on, like an infection.

Time and frequency of feedings. Breastfeeding requires a big time commitment from mothers, especially in the beginning, when babies feed often. A breastfeeding schedule or the need to pump breast milk during the day can make it harder for some moms to work, run errands, or travel.

And breastfed babies do need to eat more often than babies who take formula, because breast milk digests faster than formula. This means mom may find herself in demand every 2 or 3 hours (maybe more, maybe less) in the first few weeks.

Diet. Women who are breastfeeding need to be aware of what they eat and drink, since these can be passed to the baby through the breast milk. Just like during pregnancy, breastfeeding women should not eat fish that are high in mercury and should limit consumption of lower mercury fish.

If a mom drinks alcohol, a small amount can pass to the baby through breast milk. She should wait at least 2 hours after a single alcoholic drink to breastfeed to avoid passing any alcohol to the baby. Caffeine intake should be kept to no more than 300 milligrams (about one to three cups of regular coffee) or less per day because it can cause problems like restlessness and irritability in some babies.

Maternal medical conditions, medicines, and breast surgery. Medical conditions such as HIV or AIDS or those that involve chemotherapy or treatment with certain medicines can make breastfeeding unsafe. A woman should check with her doctor or a lactation consultant if she's unsure if she should breastfeed with a specific condition. Women should always check with the doctor about the safety of taking medicines while breastfeeding, including over-the-counter and herbal medicines.

Mothers who've had breast surgery, such as a reduction, may have difficulty with their milk supply if their milk ducts have been severed. In this situation, a woman should to talk to her doctor about her concerns and work with a lactation specialist.

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All About Formula Feeding

Commercially prepared infant formulas are a nutritious alternative to breast milk, and even contain some vitamins and nutrients that breastfed babies need to get from supplements.

Manufactured under sterile conditions, commercial formulas attempt to duplicate mother's milk using a complex combination of proteins, sugars, fats, and vitamins that aren't possible to create at home. So if you don't breastfeed your baby, it's important to use only commercially prepared formula and not try to make your own.

Besides medical concerns that may prevent breastfeeding, for some women, breastfeeding may be too difficult or stressful. Here are other reasons women may choose to formula feed:

Convenience. Either parent (or another caregiver) can feed the baby a bottle at any time (although this is also true for women who pump their breast milk). This allows mom to share the feeding duties and helps her partner to feel more involved in the crucial feeding process and the bonding that often comes with it.

Flexibility. Once the bottles are made, a formula-feeding mother can leave her baby with a partner or caregiver and know that her little one's feedings are taken care of. There's no need to pump or to schedule work or other obligations and activities around the baby's feeding schedule. And formula-feeding moms don't need to find a private place to nurse in public.

Time and frequency of feedings. Because formula is less digestible than breast milk, formula-fed babies usually need to eat less often than breastfed babies.

Diet. Women who opt to formula feed don't have to worry about the things they eat or drink that could affect their babies.

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Formula Feeding Challenges

As with breastfeeding, there are some challenges to consider when deciding whether to formula feed.

Lack of antibodies. None of the antibodies found in breast milk are in manufactured formula. So formula can't provide a baby with the added protection against infection and illness that breast milk does.

Can't match the complexity of breast milk. Manufactured formulas have yet to duplicate the complexity of breast milk, which changes as the baby's needs change.

Planning and organization. Unlike breast milk — which is always available, unlimited, and served at the right temperature — formula feeding your baby requires planning and organization to make sure that you have what you need when you need it. Parents must buy formula and make sure it's always on hand to avoid late-night runs to the store.

And it's important to always have the necessary supplies (like bottles and nipples) clean, easily accessible, and ready to go — otherwise, you will have a very hungry, very fussy baby to answer to. With 8-10 feedings in a 24-hour period, parents can quickly get overwhelmed if they're not prepared and organized.

Expense. Formula can be costly. Powdered formula is the least expensive, followed by concentrated, with ready-to-feed being the most expensive. And specialty formulas (such as soy and hypoallergenic) cost more — sometimes far more — than the basic formulas. During the first year of life, the cost of basic formula can run about $1,500.

Possibility of producing gas and constipation. Formula-fed babies may have more gas and firmer bowel movements than breastfed babies.

Making a Choice

Deciding how you will feed your baby can be a hard decision. You'll really only know the right choice for your family when your baby comes.

Many women decide on one method before the birth and then change their minds after their baby is born. And many women decide to breastfeed and supplement with formula because they find that is the best choice for their family and their lifestyle.

While you're weighing the pros and cons, talk to your doctor or lactation consultant. These health care providers can give you more information about your options and help you make the best decision for your family.

Breastfeeding and the mother-child bond | Newborn Care

You've been imagining meeting your baby for months, and finally it's happened. The first weeks of breastfeeding are a special time when you get to know each other and forge an emotional connection.

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After the birth of a baby, all-consuming love and the desire to protect him can literally overwhelm you. However, an emotional connection is an individual experience, so don't worry if it doesn't happen right away. It takes time to get to know a child well. The emotional bond between parents and baby develops and strengthens in the process of caring for him.

For both parents, the most important thing is to get used to caring for a child: to be near him, to talk, to take him in his arms, to cuddle him. This increases your confidence in your parenting abilities, creates the best emotional, physical and psychological conditions for your baby, and also contributes to successful breastfeeding.

Skin-to-skin contact with your baby

You've probably heard how important skin-to-skin contact is when you cuddle a diaper-only baby against your bare chest (if it's cool, you can put a sweater or light blanket over the top). Early skin-to-skin contact, preferably within the first hour after birth, releases hormones that encourage the baby to find the breast and start suckling. 1 One study found that newborns who spent more than 50 minutes in skin-to-skin contact were eight times more likely to suckle spontaneously. 2 However, skin-to-skin contact is not only important in the first hour of life. This is a great way to calm the baby in any situation. In addition, it stimulates milk production.

Skin to skin contact is good for the baby in many other ways. It normalizes the heartbeat and breathing, helps maintain optimal body temperature and healthy blood sugar levels. 3 If, for any reason, you are unable to hold your baby immediately after birth, skin-to-skin contact can be provided by your partner so that the baby can experience all the benefits listed, feeling safe, loved and warm.

Oxytocin: a prerequisite for breastfeeding and forming an emotional bond

Adjusting to your new role as a mother can be difficult, but precious moments in direct contact with your baby have a beneficial effect not only on him, but also on you.

Skin-to-skin contact in the mother's body creates a powerful calming hormonal cocktail, one of the main ingredients of which is oxytocin, the hormone of love and hugs. Oxytocin is produced with every contact with a newborn, and even when you just think about the baby or smell him. This smart hormone helps you adapt to motherhood. It stimulates "maternal behavior" - the desire to caress the child, look into his eyes and talk to him gently. 4

In addition, oxytocin fights feelings of anxiety and depression, thereby protecting you from postpartum depression. 5 It is also believed that the release of oxytocin shortly after birth prepares the brain for breastfeeding and stimulates milk production. 6

In addition, the mother produces beta-endorphin, a hormone that encourages her to respond to the needs of the child. Don't be surprised by the all-consuming desire to comfort a crying baby - this is a natural maternal instinct. In addition, beta-endorphin creates a feeling of pleasure and calmness. 3

What a newborn looks like

You will probably think your baby is the most beautiful creature in the world, but in fact, newborns usually look bruised and wrinkled, and sometimes even bruised or have a pointed skull, especially if forceps were used during birth or vacuum to extract the fetus.

In addition, the body of a newborn may be covered with so-called "stork bites" or "angel kisses" - red spots that disappear after a few months. The hands and feet of a newborn may have a bluish tint. All this is absolutely normal.

After a few days, the skin will smooth out, the head will become more round, and the primordial lubrication (cheesy white substance that protected the baby's skin in the womb) will disappear. There is no need to rinse off the lubricant - it is a natural moisturizer.

For the first few days, only the baby's head, buttocks and genitals should be washed (unless, of course, he has been soiled from head to toe with the contents of the diaper!). Bathing the whole baby is not required.

Washing your baby can be a great way for your partner to bond emotionally with the baby and take part in the care of the baby if the baby is fully breastfed. The rest of the baby's umbilical cord usually falls off within a couple of weeks. It does not look very pretty, but the main thing is to keep it clean and dry - then everything will be in order.

Making eye contact with the baby

Newborns can only see black, white and gray
(the color spectrum expands by about three months), 7 and their eyes can focus on objects no further than 25 cm (9.8 inches). This is enough for the baby to see your face while feeding. He may even briefly make eye contact with you. In the early days, you will have to feed the baby very often, so you will have the opportunity to enjoy this visual intimacy several times a day.

Forming an emotional connection with the voice

Full-term babies have good hearing. The fetus reacts to sounds as early as the 19th week of pregnancy. 8 It has been proven that newborns prefer the voice of their mother 9 to all others and even recognize the melodies they heard while they were in the womb. 10

Talking quietly to your baby creates two-way communication, which is important for your child's social development in the future. 11 You can talk about guests, about the view from the window - about anything. Newborns are very grateful listeners.

“Walking with Iris in the early days, I told her what I saw — trees, flowers, children playing,” recalls Anna, a mother from the UK.

Singing is another great way to form an emotional connection, 12 it doesn't matter if you have a voice. “While my daughter Leni was very young, I sang songs to her when I changed diapers,” says Charlotte, a mother from the UK, “Now she is 18 months old, and I still sing the same songs to her, usually at night. She loves it very much - familiar melodies calm her down.

The power of touch

Touch is very important for a child. Hugs, petting, rocking, and other caresses are a great way to soothe your baby and make him feel safe, 13 and stimulate the release of oxytocin. By the way, did you know that the baby has already developed a grasping reflex? Try touching his palms or stroking his feet and see what happens.

“While Vivienne and Marcus were babies, they liked having their feet massaged. Now I continue to do this before bed. I tried to take them in my arms as often as possible - it was a great way to establish an emotional connection with them, ”says Rachel, a mother from Australia.

Dee, a mother from South Africa, loved wearing her baby in a scarf sling. In her opinion, this not only allows you to establish an emotional connection with the child: “It helped us a lot to establish breastfeeding. Now my daughter is 17 months old, but she still loves it when I wear her in a sling.”

Attractive mother's scent

Newborns have a well-developed sense of smell, which plays a key role in establishing an emotional bond between mother and child. The newborn is attracted by the smell of the mother's breast. Scientists explain this by saying that Montgomery's glands (small bumps on the areola - dark areas of the skin around the nipples) secrete a secret that smells like amniotic fluid. 14

In addition, the baby recognizes the smell of the mother and can even smell her breast milk from that of another woman. 15 And when mother and baby hug and smell each other, oxytocin is released, which, as already mentioned, helps to establish an emotional connection and establish breastfeeding.

It is important to understand that all mothers and babies are different and it may take time for you to get used to each other. If you have any questions or concerns, please contact your healthcare provider for advice and assistance.

Literature

1 Klaus M. Mother and infant: early emotional ties. Pediatrics. 1998;102( E 1):1244-1246. - Klaus M. , "Mother and child: the origin of emotional bonds". Pediatrix (Pediatrics). 1998;102(E1):1244-1246.

2 Gomez AP et al. Kangaroo method in delivery room for full-term babies. An Esp Pediatr. 1998;48(6):631-633. - Gomez A.P. et al., "Application of the Kangaroo Technique to Term Babies in the Delivery Room." An Esp Pediatr. 1998;48(6):631-633.

3 Crenshaw JT. Healthy birth practice #6: Keep mother and baby together—It’s best for mother, baby, and breastfeeding. J Perinat Educ . 2014;23(4):211-217. — Crenshaw, JT, "Physiological Birthing Practices #6: Mother and Baby Should Be Together - Better for Mother, Baby, and Breastfeeding." J Perinat Eduk (Perinatal education). 2014;23(4):211-217.

4 Britton JR et al. Breastfeeding, sensitivity, and attachment. Pediatrics. 2006;118(5): e 1436-1443. - Britton J.R. et al., Breastfeeding, Sensitivity and Attachment. Pediatrix (Pediatrics). 2006;118(5):e1436-1443.

5 Kim S et al. Oxytocin and postpartum depression: delivering on what's known and what's not. Brain Res . 2014;1580:219-232. - Kim S. et al., "Oxytocin and postpartum depression: what we know and what we don't know." Brain Res. 2014;1580:219-232.

6 Uvänas-Moberg K, Prime DK. Oxytocin effects in mothers and infants during breastfeeding. Infant . 2013;9(6):201-206.- Uvenas-Moberg K., Prime D.K., "The effects of oxytocin on mother and child during breastfeeding." Infant. 2013;9(6):201-206.

7 Franklin A , Davies New evidence for infant color categories. Br J Dev Psychol. 2004;22(3):349-377. http://citeseerx.ist.psu. edu/viewdoc/download?doi=10.1.1.456.5409&rep=rep1&type=pdf - Franklin, A., Davis, I.R., "New Evidence for Color Perception in Infants ". Br J Dev Saikol. 2004;22(3):349-377.

8 Hepper PG The development of fetal hearing. Arch DisChild. 1994;6(3): F 81-87. - Hepper P.J., Shahidullah B.S., "The Development of Hearing in the Prenatal Period". Arch Dis Child. 1994;6(3):F81-87.

9 Lee GY, Kisilevsky BS. Fetuses respond to father's voice but prefer mother's voice after birth. DevPsychobiol. 2014;56(1):1-11. — Lee JI, Kisilewski BS, "Fetus responds to paternal voice but prefers mother's voice after birth." Dev Psychobiol. 2014;56(1):1-11.

10 Partanen E et al. Prenatal music exposure induces long-term neural effects. PLoS One . 2013;8(10): e 78946. - Partanen, I. et al., Prenatal music listening has long-term effects on the brain. PLOS One. 2013;8(10):e78946.

11 Kirk E et al. A longitudinal investigation of the relationship between maternal mind - mindedness and theory of mind. Br J Dev Psychol. 2015;33(4):434-445. — Kirk, I. et al., "Longitudinal study of the relationship between mother's orientation towards intelligence development and child's mental state model." Br Zh Dev Psychol. 2015;33(4):434-445.

12 de l'Etoile SK. Infant behavioral responses to infant-directed singing and other maternal interactions. Infant Behav Dev . 2006;29(3):456-470. - de l'Etoile SK, "Infant behavioral response to singing and other interactions with the mother." Infante Behave Dev. 2006;29(3):456-470.

13 Moore ER et al. Early skin-to-skin contact for mothers and their healthy newborn infants. Cochrane Database Syst Rev . 2012;5(3). - Mur I.R. et al., "Early skin-to-skin contact and its impact on mothers and healthy newborns". Cochrane Database Syst Rev. Rev. 2012;5(3).

14 Doucet S et al. The secretion of areolar (Montgomery's) glands from lactating women elicits selective, unconditional responses in neonates.PLoS One . 2009;4(10): e 7579. - Doucet S. et al., "Papillary gland secretion (Montgomery's glands) in lactating women induces a selective unconditioned response in the newborn." PLOS One. 2009;4(10):e7579.

15 Vaglio S. Chemical communication and mother-infant recognition. 2009;2(3):279-281. - Vaglio S., "Chemical Communication and Recognition in the Mother-Child Pair". Commune Integral Biol. 009;2(3):279-281.

Breastfeeding on demand

You can often hear from a nursing mother: "I feed on demand, my baby requires a breast every 3. 5 hours." Or: “I have always fed on demand. In a year, we already had 1 feeding in the evening, and my child calmly refused to breastfeed. Before talking about the demand of the child, it is necessary to find out what modern women mean when they say - "I breastfeed."

Mothers today consider breastfeeding essential for feeding their baby. Just for feeding. Breast milk is food, the mother supplies the baby with the nutrients necessary for growth and development. When a baby suckles at the breast, he eats. Breastfeeding makes sense only as a process of supplying proteins, fats, carbohydrates, vitamins and microelements.

During suckling, the baby receives the nutrients it needs with mother's milk. This is the absolute truth. There is another unconditional truth, which is not given any importance in modern society, it is not taken into account and is not considered. Breastfeeding for a child is communication with the mother. We need to figure out how the child understands feeding on demand? Can he understand anything at all? Is there any difference for him how he is fed, for 15-20 minutes after 3. 5 hours or in some other way?

What is on-demand feeding

On-demand feeding of a newborn baby means putting it on the breast for every squeak or search. Squeak and search movements in newborns, even as early as the second or third day of life, begin to appear much more often than after 3.5 or 2.5 hours. The need for attachments increases rapidly, and by the 10-12th day of life, the need to attach to a child may occur 15-16 or more times a day. Applications vary in duration. The baby can fall asleep and sleep while sucking for, for example, 1.5-2 hours. Can release the breast after 1-2 minutes. And then ask her again. Why does a child need such frequent contact with his mother's breast?

That's why. Being in the mother's belly, in a calm, familiar environment, listening to the noises of the mother's body, being in a warm, cramped, confined space, the baby sucked his fist, fingers, loops of the umbilical cord, swallowed amniotic fluid. Learned to suck and swallow. After birth, experiencing discomfort for any, the most insignificant reason, the baby tries to get rid of it. You can get rid of discomfort by getting into the usual conditions of a comfortable stay. The only place where the baby after birth can feel the sensations familiar to him is in the arms of the mother. The only familiar action is sucking. The only familiar taste and smell is the taste and smell of milk and lube in the areola. Milk and lubricant have an odor and taste similar to the taste and smell of amniotic fluid. Therefore, experiencing discomfort, the baby squeaks, or begins to look for an object to suck with his mouth. Ideally, it is immediately applied to the chest. The baby becomes warm, cramped, he hears the beating of his mother's heart, breathing, grumbling in the intestines, he sucks and feels the familiar taste and smell. If such an action happens constantly, the baby gains confidence, no matter what happens, he will solve all his problems with his mother. The place of comfort is now under the breast, and you can suck on the breast.

This whole process is justified from a biological point of view. A newborn child does not feel the feeling of hunger, this feeling is not formed in him. It will begin to form at about two months of age. How to feed a creature that does not experience hunger ?! How to encourage him to take some action to get food? This can be done only at the expense of some other incentives. This stimulus for the newborn is constant bodily discomfort, thanks to which he wants to suckle all the time! The most intense, frequent and prolonged sucking in infants is observed in the first two or three months of life. It is in these first months that the main weight gain of the baby occurs.

Feeding in the first month

Baby falls asleep with the breast in his mouth, sleeps sucking for a while. Falling asleep deeply, lets go of the chest. After sleeping for a while, he wakes up, and is applied on waking. After sleep, he can stay awake for some time, for example, an hour and a half. During wakefulness, he may feel discomfort 2-3 times, for example, from a completely natural desire to pee, and having called his mother for help, having kissed for a couple of minutes, he will do his deeds. Then he will want to sleep, feel discomfort and, kissing his chest, will again fall asleep sucking. After some time, he will wake up and attach again. Then again a little "walk". And after some time, he will fall asleep at the chest again.

The daytime naps of a one-month-old baby feeding on demand vary in duration and number. There can be 4-6 dreams during the day, and they can last from 5-15 minutes to 2-2.5 sometimes 3 hours. "Around" each dream, the baby is applied to the chest, and applied between dreams several times. At night, the child falls asleep at the breast. Usually in the early morning hours, he begins to fuss and apply. In the morning, he almost never fully wakes up. The baby sleeps, from time to time, sucking on his mother's breast. Waking up in the morning, the baby is again applied to the chest. If you count all the attachments that have happened in a baby of one month of age, then approximately 16-20 attachments are obtained. This is how a newborn human cub behaves if it is given the opportunity to behave in accordance with physiological and psychological needs, which, by the way, are genetically determined. The child of the first months of life does not separate his personality from the personality of the mother and from her breast. Mom and her breasts, and everything connected with them, are the universe of the baby and himself.

In most cases, a modern woman, being afraid to “accustom a child to hands”, strives to limit his requests for sucking. A pacifier and a bottle of tea or water come to her aid in this matter. They, too, can be sucked ... The need for sucking seems to be satisfied. But only the need for communication with the mother during suckling is not satisfied, the peculiar chain of mutual assistance and cooperation between mother and baby is destroyed, the formation of maternal affection and concentration is disrupted. Is the difference in the two actions noticeable to the reader: the baby cried, the mother took him, put him to her chest and started rocking him, or gave him a pacifier and started rocking the stroller, even with the words “Why are you crying, my sun?”

The modern woman who gives a pacifier and pumps a stroller is not a bad person who deliberately harms an infant. She is simply in captivity of prejudices regarding the relationship between mother and baby. She does not know how to behave correctly, does not know what to do in accordance with the natural needs of the child. If you tell her what the child really needs, she will exclaim in horror: “What is it, don’t let him get away with?!” Indeed, the child of the first months of life must not be let off the hook. For a woman who does not know how to comfortably carry a baby, and who does not know how to feed him in various positions (sitting, lying, standing and even moving), this can be very difficult. Especially if she is not sure of the correctness of her actions.

An action that should become automatic for the mother of a newborn: when the baby cries or shows other signs of anxiety, put the baby to the breast.

What's next?

The baby is growing. A fairly stable rhythm of daytime sleep begins to form in him, and a 3-4-month-old baby behaves quite differently from a newborn. Feeding on demand at this age looks something like this...

  • At three months, the baby has 10-12 feeds during the day and 2-4 at night. There are frequent applications for a short time, but their number is reduced. There may be a long night break in feedings, about 5 hours, but this is very rare. Much more often the night break is 2.5-3.5 hours. By this age, the baby's body is noticeably rounded.
  • At four months, the baby begins to breastfeed noticeably less frequently. The main feedings are associated with sleep: the baby suckles before bedtime, during awakening and during sleep, both daytime and nighttime. In this regard, he has a fairly accurate feeding regimen. And many babies stop breastfeeding when they wake up after daytime sleep, sometimes as early as 2.5-3 months.
  • At five months, the baby has 8-10 daytime feedings and 2-3 nighttime feedings, as well as in the fourth month of life, they are organized around dreams - the baby eats when going to bed and some babies suckle when they wake up.
  • Feeding regimen changes at six months. The most active sucking shifts to the last 2-3 hours before waking up from a night's sleep. The period of daytime wakefulness can be divided into two periods: in the morning, when the baby sucked during the night is rarely applied to the breast, and in the evening, when attachments become very frequent. In total, there can be 7-10 day applications and 3-4 night applications. At this age, the baby begins a period of acquaintance with new food - pedagogical complementary foods. Sometimes there are attachments associated with the introduction of complementary foods, the baby “washes down” samples of new food with mother's milk. But many children do not want to drink complementary foods. When complementary foods are introduced to an on-demand baby, it is never meant to replace feedings with complementary foods. This is practically impossible, because the main feedings of the baby are associated with sleep, and mother's breakfasts, lunches and dinners, during which the baby gets acquainted with new food, are located between the baby's dreams, during his wakefulness.
  • At seven months, the application frequency is about the same.
  • At eight months, the feeding regimen changes. Since the baby shows high motor activity and is very busy exploring the surrounding space, in the daytime he forgets to breastfeed. In this regard, the number of daily feedings can be reduced to 6-8 times. The baby compensates for the reduction in daytime feedings by increasing the frequency and duration of nighttime feedings up to 6 times.
  • In the second half of the year, babies who stopped breastfeeding when waking up after daytime naps again recall this habit. The baby’s daytime sleep in the second half of life, as well as in the region of a year and older, looks something like this: the baby falls asleep sucking, sleeps quietly for a while, for example 1-1.5 hours, then starts tossing and turning, fiddling, worrying, at this moment the mother lies down next to , gives him a breast and the baby can fill up 10-15-30 minutes sucking. Mom may well use this time for her own rest - lie down, read, while the baby sleeps while sucking. I know my mother, a lover of embroidery, who used this time specifically for embroidery ...
  • Breastfeeding becomes more frequent at nine to ten months. In the daytime, this is 4-6 full feedings and about the same number of attachments for various reasons. The baby has new reasons for attachment. If, during active actions to master the world, the baby fills a bump or gets scared, he calms down with his mother's breast. There may be situations when you can comfort the baby by sitting next to him and hugging him. At night, 4-6 feedings remain, the baby begins to suckle more actively in the morning between 3 and 8 hours.
  • At eleven months, a baby can already have 2-3 complete complementary foods. Initiation to adult food in the mind of a child is not associated with breastfeeding: attachment to the mother's breast is something other than the desire to get enough of the product they like. As a rule, after the baby has eaten, he feels the need to attach himself to the breast. The number of daily feedings remains the same in the child, but the number of short-term attachments increases. There are active mid-morning feedings between 4 and 8 o'clock in the morning.
  • At ten or twelve months, the baby, if he is already walking, can sometimes breastfeed every time he comes to his mother, i.e. about every 15-30 minutes. Attachments around dreams and night sucking persist. Therefore, if a mother says that a child suckles once or twice a day, this means that there is no feeding at the request of the child. There are restrictions imposed by the mother, with which the baby has come to terms. He treats breast sucking like food, sucks on a pacifier or a finger to fall asleep or soothe, or falls asleep just like that, without calming down.
  • At twelve months, the baby is applied in about the same way.
  • At the age of one and a half years, there may already be one daytime nap, so there are fewer attachments associated with sleep. Preserved for morning sucking. The baby is very free with his mother's breasts. Sometimes it happens that he comes up to suck just for fun. For example, like this: he comes up, climbs on his knees, looks into his mother’s face, smiles, starts to swarm in his shirt, gets breasts, smiles at his breasts, sucks for 30 seconds and leaves.

As for the number of feedings per day when feeding a child on demand, their number is almost never less than 12. A newborn has 12 or more attachments, basically they are all associated with dreams. And a child, say 1.5-2 years old, can also have about 12 attachments, only 3-4 are associated with sleep, and the rest are short-term attachments for various reasons. I suggest to all mothers reading this text - do not count the application, do not notice their duration. Breastfeed your baby as often as he asks, when you feel the need to.

Mothers who do not think about breastfeeding without looking at the clock may get the impression that when feeding on demand, the mother can do nothing but feed the baby. This is not true. After the birth of a baby, a mother begins another life, she is called life with a baby. That's all. The child is with the mother, not the mother with the child! Feel the difference! You need to be able to organize your life in a different way, in the first months, of course, the help of loved ones is very necessary. In the tradition of many peoples, it was customary for the first 40 days after childbirth to remove a woman from any housework and household chores, she was engaged only in a child. In some nations, objects that the mother of a newborn touched were considered “unclean”, therefore, they preferred to protect the mother from the rest of the household, allocating her a separate “corner” of the house, where no one bothered her and she did not interfere with anyone. Among the Slavs, such a restrictive custom was called a six-week. By 1.5-2 months, the rhythm of daytime dreams begins to form, and the baby has a kind of “regime”, the mother becomes more free.

For a mother who can't imagine breastfeeding without looking at the clock, and who is sure that the “right” baby is the baby lying quietly in her crib all the time, feeding on demand will be a complete hassle. It will be much easier for such a mother if she stops looking at the clock and ties the baby to herself with a large scarf or uses a patchwork holder (sling). It will become easier for her if she stops running between the nursery and the kitchen, but takes the baby with her to the kitchen and carries him around the house with her, doing housework, in a box, a cradle, a special chair, if she tries not to put him off often, and pick up as soon as possible, postponing the baby only in case of emergency and not for long.

Breastfeeding is not the same as house arrest. In the conditions of modern society, it is possible to organize the exit of a nursing mother to work from about 6 months of age of the baby. If necessary, you can start working from the age of 4 months, but, of course, it is better not every day of the week and not full time. It is the responsibility of a breastfeeding consultant to help a mother organize her return to work.

Sometimes, when counseling mothers on breastfeeding, I suggest that they forget for a second that they are already living in the 21st century. I propose to return, for example, to the cave and ask what they will do if the child woke up at night, how to calm him down? If you are walking through the forest and trying not to attract the attention of predators, how to make the baby silent? If the child is thirsty, what will you give him? What is the baby used to, for thousands of years of its existence? To the fact that he sleeps on his mother while she wanders through the forest with a digging stick in search of roots, and wakes up when mother stops. Since mom stopped, then there is time to wake up and suck. Therefore, even now the child sleeps well, tied to the mother with a patchwork holder, wakes up when the mother, having done a few household chores, sits in a chair to take care of the baby.

Some mother, reading about the cave, will be offended, saying that she is a civilized creature. But please think. Man, mother's breast and mother's milk have been created by evolution over millions of years. They are made for each other. Baby food has created progress and more recently. The skills of motherhood and breastfeeding have also been lost by our society quite recently. A person is not physiologically adapted to artificial feeding and a pacifier. The mother's breast will not produce enough milk at 6-7 feedings per day. Nature did not know, when creating man as a mammal, that the time would come when the need for breastfeeding would be satisfied by some kind of pacifiers and nipples.

Changes that occur during the formation of the personality of a child who did not have full contact with the mother during prolonged breastfeeding are noted by modern research by psychologists and sociologists. These are changes with a minus sign. It would be better if they were not, these changes.

Breastfeeding is important not only for the baby, it is also important for the mother. During on-demand feeding, the woman's feelings change, a stronger attachment to the baby is formed, the woman becomes more sensitive to the needs of the baby.

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