Girl breast feeds baby
Wet nurse: The mum who breastfeeds other women's babies
Published
Image source, Samantha Gadsden
Image caption,Samantha Gadsden's own children breastfed until they were four or five years old
By Nicola Bryan
BBC News
Any woman who has ever felt judged over her decision not to breastfeed her baby will have welcomed a statement issued by the Royal College of Midwives (RCM) this week.
On Tuesday, the organisation said if a woman decides to formula-feed her baby it is her choice and must be respected.
But before the introduction of the feeding bottle in the 19th Century, women who were unable or unwilling to breastfeed turned to another option - a wet nurse.
Here, a mother-of-three from Caerphilly shares her experience of breastfeeding other women's babies.
Samantha Gadsden knows breastfeeding can be a contentious issue - especially when the baby you are feeding belongs to another woman.
She has been volunteering her time - and her breasts - to other women's babies since first becoming a mother herself 10 years ago.
"I can't even remember any more how many booby brothers and sisters my children have," the 47-year-old said.
Image source, Samantha Gadsden
Image caption,Samantha Gadsden has three children aged 10, eight and five
She first acted as a wet nurse to help out a friend whose baby was in hospital. The woman's older baby was not allowed to stay on the ward and had never used a bottle.
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"She phoned me because she was pretty desperate for someone to have him.... I said 'fine but how am I going to feed him?'.
"She said 'I was kind of hoping that you'd feed him', so that's what I did."
She has also breastfed a friend's baby while babysitting: "She asked me because she knew I'd feed the baby. It's just easier because a lot of these breastfed babies aren't used to bottles."
Image source, Samantha Gadsden
Image caption,Wet nursing is more common than people think, Samantha Gadsden says
Another time she responded to a new mother who was looking for donor breast milk online: "She had twins and they were starving... She was in hospital, she'd had an operation and she couldn't feed and couldn't pump... they were throwing up formula.
"I said 'I haven't got a pump but I've got a pair of boobs so, if you're that desperate, I'll feed your babies'.
"We're quite firm friends now. That was a couple of years ago and we've just been on holiday."
She said she had never experienced jealousy from the mothers of the babies she has fed: "If someone's asking you to feed their babies, it's because they need help and you're giving it to them, so no.
"
Image source, Samantha Gadsden
Image caption,Samantha Gadsden tandem fed two of her children
Ms Gadsden works as a doula - a woman who gives support, help and advice to another woman during pregnancy and during and after the birth.
But she said the wet nursing was completely separate to her paid work and she would never accept money for feeding another woman's baby.
"It's not a professional thing, it's something I do as mother-to-mother support," she said.
"[Wet nursing] is not something that I would do for money. I don't think particularly that doing it for money is wrong, to be honest, because everything has a value, but personally, no."
She has had varied reactions when people learn about her wet nursing: "If they're in the breastfeeding community or my friends it's 'that's amazing, it's so lovely that you do that for other people' but other people are 'oh my God'.
She has had particularly strong reactions when people find out she had fed babies after meeting the mother online: "[They said] 'she didn't even know you, you could have been anything, you could have had anything, you might have had Aids'.
"For a start, most breastfeeding women have just been through the NHS screening programme themselves and they're not all out there having orgies and suddenly developing these weird diseases.
"And to a certain degree, if you're going to ask somebody to give your baby milk, there's got to be an element of trust there in the first place."
Image source, Samantha Gadsden
Image caption,Samantha Gadsden had her youngest child at home when she was 42
She is certain there are many more wet nurses out there, and more women would use them if they knew it was an option : "I think a lot more of it goes on than we know about - people just don't always say about it."
The National Childbirth Trust said wet nursing was "not common in the UK" but acknowledged some women informally feed other women's babies.
In a statement it said: "Some people may find the subject of wet-nursing uncomfortable. There is no legal reason, however, why women who wish to wet nurse or use a wet nurse cannot do so, and NCT believes that women setting up an agreement between themselves to do this should be supported in their decision.
"
Public Health Wales, the body overseeing health and wellbeing in Wales, said mothers should aim to give their baby nothing but breast milk for the first six months and continue to provide it at least until their baby's first birthday.
It said if a mother's own milk was not available the next best thing would be donated breast milk, but those sharing milk should be aware of the risks which include the transmission of blood-borne viruses and other infections, the transfer of chemicals, and the bacterial contamination after collection.
Busted: 14 myths about breastfeeding
"You should only eat plain food while breastfeeding." Fact or fiction?
UNICEF/UNI183001/Quintos
1. Myth: Breastfeeding is easy.
Babies are born with the reflex to look for their mother’s breast. However, many mothers need practical support with positioning their baby for breastfeeding and making sure their baby is correctly attached to the breast.
Breastfeeding takes time and practice for both mothers and babies. Breastfeeding is also time intensive, so mothers need space and support at home and work.
2. Myth: It’s usual for breastfeeding to hurt – sore nipples are inevitable.
Many mothers experience discomfort in the first few days after birth when they are learning to breastfeed. But with the right support with positioning their baby for breastfeeding and making sure their baby is correctly attached to the breast, sore nipples can be avoided. If a mother faces breastfeeding challenges like sore nipples, support from a lactation consultant or other skilled professional can help them overcome the issue.
3. Myth: You should wash your nipples before breastfeeding.
Washing your nipples before breastfeeding isn’t necessary. When babies are born, they are already very familiar with their own mother’s smells and sounds. The nipples produce a substance that the baby smells and has ‘good bacteria’ that helps to build babies’ own healthy immune system for life.
UNICEF/UN0140320/Ayene
Did you know? Breastfeeding protects your baby from ear infections, diarrhoea, pneumonia and other childhood diseases.
4. Myth: You should separate a newborn and mother to let the mother rest.
Doctors, nurses and midwives often encourage the practice of ‘skin-to-skin’ – also known as kangaroo mother care – immediately after birth. Bringing your baby in direct contact, so their skin is against yours, is a very important practice that helps them to find and attach to the breast. If you can practice this within one hour after birth and then frequently after, it helps to establish breastfeeding. If the mother cannot do this, then the partner or another family member can step in.
5. Myth: You should only eat plain food while breastfeeding.
Like everybody else, breastfeeding mothers need to eat a balanced diet. In general, there is no need to change food habits. Babies are exposed to their mothers’ food preferences from the time they are in the womb.
If a mother perceives that her baby reacts to a specific food she eats, it is best to consult a specialist.
6. Myth: Exercise will affect the taste of your milk.
Exercise is healthy, also for breastfeeding mothers. There is no evidence that it affects the taste of your milk.
7. Myth: You won’t be able to breastfeed unless you do it straight away.
It is easier to get breastfeeding started if you begin in the first hour after birth because a baby’s reflexes are very strong at that time. They are ready to learn to feed at the breast. If you do not latch your baby on right after birth, do it as soon as possible in your situation. If you need help putting your baby to the breast, ask for support from a qualified lactation consultant or other skilled professional. Frequent skin-to-skin contact and putting your baby to the breast will help to get breastfeeding going.
UNICEF/UN040621
Did you know? Breastfeeding protects the mother from diabetes, breast and ovarian cancers, heart disease and postpartum depression.
8. Myth: You can never use formula if you want to breastfeed.
Mothers may decide they need to use formula on some occasions, while continuing to breastfeed. It is important to seek unbiased information on formula and other products that replace breastmilk. To keep breastmilk production going, continue offering the breast to your baby as often as possible. It can be useful for mothers to consult a lactation specialist or skilled professional to help with a plan that works best for them to continue breastfeeding.
9. Myth: Many mothers can’t produce enough milk.
Almost all mothers produce the right amount of milk for their babies. Breastmilk production is determined by how well the baby is latched on to the breast, the frequency of breastfeeding and how well the baby is removing milk with each feeding. Breastfeeding isn’t a ‘one woman’ job and mothers need support. Support like ongoing breastfeeding guidance from health care providers, help at home, and staying healthy by eating and drinking well.
10. Myth: You shouldn't breastfeed if you’re sick.
Depending on the kind of illness, mothers can usually continue breastfeeding when they’re sick. You need to make sure you get the right treatment, and to rest, eat and drink well. In many cases, the antibodies your body makes to treat your disease or illness will pass on to your baby, building his or her own defences.
11. Myth: You can’t take any medication if you’re breastfeeding.
It’s important to inform your doctor that you are breastfeeding and to read the instructions with any medications you buy over the counter. It might be necessary to take medications at a specific time or in a specific dosage, or to take an alternative formulation. You should also tell the baby’s doctor about any medications that you’re taking.
UNICEF/UN0160505/Soares
Did you know? The ‘first milk’ – or colostrum – is rich in antibodies and gives newborns an immunity boost while their own immune systems are still developing.
12. Myth: Babies who have been breastfed are clingy.
All babies are different. Some are clingy and some are not, no matter how they are fed. Breastfeeding provides not only the best nutrition for infants, but is also important for their developing brain. Breastfed babies are held a lot and because of this, breastfeeding has been shown to enhance bonding with their mother.
13. Myth: It’s hard to wean a baby if you breastfeed for more than a year.
There’s no evidence that it is more difficult to stop breastfeeding after one year, but there is evidence that breastfeeding up to two years is beneficial for both mothers and children. All mothers and babies are different and need to determine together how long they want to breastfeed.
14. Myth: If you go back to work, you’ll have to wean your baby.
Many mothers continue breastfeeding after going back to work. First, check the policies in your country and your own workplace.
If you have the right to time and a place to breastfeed during working hours, you may be able to go home and breastfeed, ask a family member or friend to bring your baby to you, or to express your milk and take it home. If you don’t have the option to breastfeed during working hours, look for moments during the day to express your milk and then feed your baby directly when you are at home. If you decide to give your baby a breastmilk substitute for some feeds, it still very good to continue breastfeeding whenever you are with your baby.
This article was developed in collaboration with Dr. Michele Griswold PhD, MPH, RN, IBCLC. Dr Griswold is a lactation consultant, registered nurse, breastfeeding researcher and advocate. She represents the International Lactation Consultant Association to the WHO/UNICEF Global Breastfeeding Collective, which calls on governments and society as a whole to provide mothers the support they need to breastfeed.
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Muscovites again outraged breastfeeding mother
“In the Moscow metro car near the Vykhino station, a girl bared her breasts and began to feed her baby. Many were outraged, considering such behavior obscene, and the child was old enough to breastfeed. The check has begun,” the caption to the photo reads.
What kind of check was started and by whom, the authors of the channel do not specify. Probably, they decided to check the quality of milk and whether the child was full.
As expected, a discussion unleashed under the post for more than 800 comments. It turned out that many readers of the public are not concerned about the behavior of a woman, but the reaction to it: is it surprising to anyone else that a woman can breastfeed in a public place, and should a whole post be devoted to this?
"Well, feed and feed.
"
“There is nothing wrong with breastfeeding babies. You can feed in public places, but it makes sense to try to move away from crowded places.”
“There are simply no special places for feeding in the metro, it’s better to let them feed than a small one yells at the whole car.”
We cannot but agree with such comments. Unfortunately, we have seen other reactions more than once. Criticism of the practice of breastfeeding has long become commonplace.
Only this spring, in the public “Overheard in the Moscow Metro”, a survey was conducted about GV, in which 3,251 users of the social network Vkontakte took part. More than 40 percent believe that breastfeeding a child in a public place is “stressing, but tolerable”, 27 percent chose the option “tough, how is it possible”, and 31 percent felt that “it's normal”.
Interesting on the topic
For World Breastfeeding Week: thanks to everyone who rolled out boobs
NAN devoted more than one text to the topic of breastfeeding in public.
We said that opponents of breastfeeding in public places consider this matter indecent and expose women as crazy perverts. They suggest that women breastfeed only at home or express milk in advance and bottle feed.
Some compare the process of feeding with sex, going to the toilet and masturbation - in general, with what is indecent to do in public. Why the road to hell is paved with such metaphors, our columnist Tamara Vysotskaya wrote a column.
We have explained that often a woman does not do this out of pleasure or a desire to show her breasts to the public. Most likely, the child began to cry or became capricious, and the woman had to calm him down in this way.
“This forced step implicitly spreads the idea that breastfeeding is normal everywhere, even on the Moon. This is not a demonstration of the chest, not a performance, not a protest, not an attempt to spit in your soul. Babies are people whom nature has arranged to be mammals.
And placed the source of this milk in the mother's breast, imagine. Probably to annoy you. That is why it is simply ridiculous to speak “for” or “against” breastfeeding in public. You can just live with the fact that it exists. And don't argue," says the NAN book.
We also wrote that shaming of breastfeeding mothers became widespread only at the end of the twentieth century. Previously, breastfeeding was considered something absolutely normal and did not raise questions. In confirmation of this, Facebook user* Renee Johnson posted thirty historical photographs on her page, in which women of different eras, nationalities and social statuses breastfeed their children in public places (the age of children, by the way, also varies - from newborn babies to quite meaningful toddlers) .
Now breastfeeding in public can be a scandal. For example, NEN told the story of Sophie Yoels, which took place in 2021, who was forbidden to breastfeed her child in a candy store on the Arbat in Moscow.
The woman turned to a lawyer who helped her write instructions for women who faced discrimination due to breastfeeding in a public place.
So if you want to breastfeed your baby when you need to, get the advice of a lawyer and, if in doubt, read on for tips on how to stop worrying and start breastfeeding your baby in public.
Prejudices related to breastfeeding
Instead of an introduction, I would like to say that the ideas of modern women about breastfeeding are a collection of prejudices. They are so common that in many books for expectant mothers and in magazines for parents, it is actions based on prejudice that are described as correct and necessary.
“Breastfeeding is something incredibly difficult, almost no one is able to feed for a long time, everyone always has a lot of problems and one sheer inconvenience”
There is nothing easier, more comfortable, more enjoyable for mother and baby, and, by the way, cheaper than properly organized breastfeeding.
But for that to be the case, breastfeeding needs to be learned. The best teacher in this matter may not be a book or a magazine for parents, but a woman who has been breastfeeding her child for a long time, more than a year, and receiving positive emotions from this. There are women who breastfeed for a long time and perceived it as a punishment. For example, one mother fed a child for 1.5 years and for all these 1.5 years she pumped after each feeding, and when she decided that she was enough and decided to wean the child, she had mastitis due to wrong actions. Now she tells everyone that breastfeeding is hell. She didn't feed her baby properly for a single day.
"Breastfeeding spoils the shape of the breast"
It is true that breastfeeding does not improve the shape of the breast, but the breast changes during pregnancy. It is then that it increases and becomes heavier, and, if its shape contributes to this, it “sags”.
Breast changes during lactation. Approximately 1-1.
5 months after birth, with stable lactation, it becomes soft, produces milk almost only when the baby suckles. After the end of breastfeeding, 1.5-3 or more years after the birth of the baby, involution of the mammary gland occurs, lactation stops. Iron "falls asleep" until the next time. Under natural conditions, the end of breastfeeding always coincides with a decrease in the baby's need for breastfeeding. The chest remains soft, inelastic. The shape of the breast largely depends on the presence of adipose tissue in it, the amount of which decreases during prolonged breastfeeding. After the end of breastfeeding, adipose tissue is gradually restored. If a woman does not feed a child, the involution of the mammary gland occurs within the first month after childbirth. The shape of the breast still does not return to its pre-pregnancy state. And if you think about it and figure out why a woman has breasts at all? It's for breastfeeding.
"Breastfeeding spoils the figure"
Many women are afraid to gain weight while breastfeeding.
But usually a woman gains weight mainly during pregnancy, and not when she is nursing. Moreover, if before pregnancy she tried to meet certain fashionable standards, for example, 90-60-90, during pregnancy she returns to her weight, her genetically incorporated physiological norm (and it may be far from fashionable standards) + the well-known 7-10kg per uterus, fetus, amniotic fluid, increased volume of circulating blood and a little bit more for various little things. Weight gain during pregnancy can be significant. Many women begin to lose weight after 6-8 months of feeding, and gradually, in the second, third year of feeding, she “drops” everything that she has accumulated. It turns out that the figure from breastfeeding often just improves.
It often happens that a woman, having stopped breastfeeding 1.5-2 months after giving birth, begins to gain weight. Perhaps this is due to the resulting hormonal imbalance, tk. no woman is designed for such a rapid cessation of lactation.
“You have to prepare the breast for feeding”. And then various recommendations follow, from sewing hard rags into the bra to advice to the husband at the end of pregnancy to “dissolve the ducts” of his wife
Breasts do not need to be prepared for feeding, it is so arranged by nature that by the time of birth it is quite ready to feed the baby. Cloths, for example, can cause skin irritation. Any manipulation of the nipple at the end of pregnancy can lead to very undesirable consequences due to the stimulation of the oxytocin reflex: stimulation of the nipple - release of oxytocin - contraction of the muscles of the uterus under the influence of oxytocin - the uterus is "in good shape" - and, as the worst option, stimulation of premature labor. And in general, has anyone seen a cat with a rag in a bra, or a monkey doing a hardening shower massage?
“With a flat, let alone inverted nipple, breastfeeding is impossible”
Strange as it may seem to people who have never breastfed, a baby's nipple is just a point from which milk flows.
If the child sucks in the correct position, then the nipple is located at the level of the soft palate and does not participate in the actual sucking. The child sucks not the nipple, but the areola, massaging, decanting it with the tongue. A breast with a flat or inverted nipple is difficult for a baby to hold in his mouth while suckling and it is more difficult for him to suck on it. Mom should show patience and perseverance in the first days after the birth of a child. Any child is perfectly trained to suck even the most uncomfortable, from our point of view, breast.
The nipple changes shape during sucking, stretches and takes on a more comfortable shape for the baby, usually in 3-4 weeks. There are also various devices called "nipple formers". They are put on immediately after feeding, when the nipple is slightly extended by the efforts of the child and worn until the next application. The nipple formers hold the nipple in an extended position. But even without these things it is quite possible to do.
It is very important for a mother with flat or inverted nipples to ensure that her baby never suckles anything but her mother's breast after birth. The child of such a mother, having sucked on a bottle or a pacifier, quickly realizes that this is a more convenient object for sucking and begins to refuse the breast. In this situation, mom will need even more patience and perseverance.
"You can't keep a newborn at the breast for more than 5 minutes, otherwise there will be cracks"
The baby should be kept at the breast for as long as he needs. Feeding ends when the baby himself releases the breast.
If we talk about cracks, then there are only three groups of reasons that lead to their formation
- Mother washes her breasts before each feeding. If she does this (and even with soap, and even anoints with brilliant green after feeding - a favorite pastime in Russian maternity hospitals, for example) - she constantly washes off the protective layer from the areola, which is produced by special glands located around the nipple, and dries the skin.
This protective lubricant exists just to prevent the loss of moisture in the delicate skin of the nipple, it has bactericidal properties and inhibits the growth of pathogenic microorganisms and, which is especially important for the child, smells about the same as amniotic fluid. The sensitive skin of some women cannot tolerate such exposure for a long time and begins to crack, even with proper attachment of the baby. -
Causes related to the incorrect position and behavior of the baby at the breast: the baby is not properly attached and sucks in the wrong position. And if this is true, then 5 minutes after 3 hours is enough for the formation of abrasions, and then cracks. The baby may latch on correctly, but in the process of suckling, he may perform various actions that can lead to cracking if the mother does not know that these actions need to be corrected and not allowed to behave like this. It must be remembered that the child has not suckled before, and does not know how to do it (he knows only the general principle of sucking).
Unfortunately, most mothers also do not know how a baby should behave at the breast; they have never, or almost never seen it. What shouldn't a child be allowed to do? "Move out" to the tip of the nipple. This happens especially often if, during sucking, the child does not stick his nose into his mother's breast. If the mother feels that the grip is changing, she should try to press the baby with her nose to her chest. Very often this is enough for the child to “put on” correctly.
If this does not help, the nipple must be removed and re-inserted correctly. The baby should not suckle the breast incorrectly for a single minute. He doesn’t care how to suck, he doesn’t know that he hurts his mother, he doesn’t know that the wrong position does not allow him to suck out enough milk, he doesn’t know that with the wrong position there is not enough stimulation of his mother’s breast and there will not be enough milk production. You can not let the child play with the nipple.
A child who has learned to slide down on the tip of the nipple sometimes begins to pass the nipple back and forth through the parted jaws. Mom, of course, it hurts or is unpleasant, but in most cases, mothers allow this to be done “If only he sucked ...” they say ... Why? It often happens that children who do not feel the touch of the breast with their nose during sucking, or do not feel it very well, begin to make search movements with the nipple in their mouth. Here you need to gently press the baby to your chest so that he understands that he is already in place and there is nothing more to look for. Sometimes, especially if the mother has long and large nipples, the baby grabs the breast in several steps, “climbing” up in several movements. This also happens in cases where the child has already sucked on the pacifier and does not open his mouth well. The nipple is injured so very quickly. To avoid this, it is necessary to properly insert the nipple into the wide-open mouth, bringing the nipple itself past the jaws, as deep as possible.
Moms don't know how to breastfeed properly.
A typical picture for maternity hospitals with separate stay is as follows: a baby was brought to the mother for 30 minutes, the baby held everything correctly and sucked well for these 30 minutes, he would still suck, but they came to pick him up and the mother pulls (slowly or quickly) his nipple from mouth. Six such pulls per day is enough for the development of abrasions. You can take the nipple only after opening the jaw with the little finger (quickly insert the tip of the finger into the corner of the mouth and turn it - it does not hurt at all and no one suffers).
Diseases of the skin of the nipples. Most often, mothers are faced with a fungal infection of the skin of the nipples - "thrush". In this situation, the skin most often looks “irritated”, it can peel off, itch, cracks may appear, even despite proper application, there may be pain during and after sucking, piercing pains along the milk ducts. This problem is usually solved with the use of specific treatment and also has nothing to do with the topic of preparing the breast for feeding or the time the baby is at the breast.
“While there is no milk, it is necessary to drink more water”
The first day after childbirth, liquid colostrum forms in the breast of a woman, on the second day it becomes thick, on 3-4 days transitional milk may appear, 7-10-18 days - milk become mature. Colostrum is scarce and thicker than milk. This is the main argument in most Russian maternity hospitals in favor of supplementing and feeding the child (otherwise he allegedly suffers from hunger and thirst).
If a child needed large volumes of liquid immediately after birth, then nature would arrange the woman in such a way that she would be flooded with colostrum immediately after childbirth. But the child does not need extra water at all. All he needs he gets from colostrum and milk! The water that is given to the child while the mother has colostrum literally “washes away” the colostrum from the gastrointestinal tract, depriving the baby of the action of colostrum necessary for him. Water is given from a bottle, which leads to "tangled nipples" in the baby and may lead to refusal of the breast.
Water causes a false feeling of fullness and reduces the need for suckling in a child. If we give a child 100 g of water per day, he sucks 100 g less milk (this applies not only to a newborn). The kidneys of a newborn are not ready for a large load of water and begin to work with overload. The list of arguments against can be continued, but these are enough.
“While there is no milk, it is necessary to supplement the child with formula, otherwise he will lose weight, starve”
The child is not designed to receive anything other than colostrum and milk. In the first days after birth, one colostrum is enough for him. Weight loss in the first day of life is a physiological norm. Newborns lose up to 6-8% of their birth weight in the first two days of their lives. Most children regain their weight or begin to put on weight by 5-7 days of life. Supplementary feeding with a mixture in the first days of a child's life is nothing more than a gross interference in the functioning of the baby's body.
You can call this intervention a metabolic catastrophe. But in most Russian maternity hospitals, this is completely ignored!
In addition, the introduction of supplementary feeding is carried out through a bottle, which very quickly leads to "tangled nipples" and the baby refuses the breast. Sometimes one or two bottle feedings are enough to stop a baby from breastfeeding! The mixture causes a feeling of fullness, lingers in the stomach for a long time, the child has a reduced need to suckle the breast, which leads to a decrease in breast stimulation and a decrease in milk production.
“I feed my baby on demand! He demands from me in 3.5 hours!”
Feeding on demand means putting the baby to the breast for every disturbance or search. The baby needs breastfeeding around every sleep, he falls asleep at the breast and when he wakes up, he is given the breast. A newborn child in the first week of his life can indeed be applied relatively rarely - 7-8 times a day, but in the second week of life, the intervals between applications are always reduced.
During wakefulness, the child can ask for a breast up to 4 times per hour, i.e. every 15 minutes! Usually a child fed on demand is applied in the first month of life 12 or more times a day, usually 16-20 times. If a child in the first months of life is applied less than 12 times, then the mother either does not notice his modest requests, or ignores them (meaning a healthy, physiologically mature child).
In the overwhelming majority of cases, at the moment when the child begins to ask for a breast more often, the mother decides that the child is starving and introduces supplementary feeding. And the child asks for breasts not at all because he is hungry. He constantly needs a sense of confirmation of physical contact with his mother. During his life in his mother's belly, he is very used to the following: warm, crowded, I hear my heart beating, my lungs breathe, my intestines growl, I smell and taste amniotic fluid (filling the baby's nose and mouth), almost all the time I suck a fist (studies suck).
Only in these conditions the baby feels comfortable and safe. After childbirth, he can get into such conditions only if his mother takes him in her arms, puts him on her breast, and then he will again feel cramped, warm, he will hear familiar rhythms, start sucking and feel the familiar smell and taste (the smell and taste of milk are similar to the taste and smell of amniotic fluid). And a newborn child wants to get into such conditions as often as possible. And a modern mother is waiting, she can’t wait, when the intervals between feedings will increase, when will the child start eating in 3.5-4 hours, when will he stop waking up at night ??? Hurry!!! And, usually, to the timid attempts of the child to ask for a breast, he answers with a pacifier, a rattle, gives some water, talks, entertains. The child is most often applied to the breast only when he wakes up. And he quickly agrees with this position. The child always takes the mother's position. But here a “pitfall” awaits mother and baby - insufficient breast stimulation and, as a result, a decrease in the amount of milk.
“Feeding on demand is a nightmare! It is impossible to sit and feed the child for days!”
That's what mothers who can't breastfeed say. With properly organized feeding, mom is resting! She lies, relaxed, hugs the baby, the baby sucks. What could be better? Most women cannot find a comfortable position, they sit, they hold the child awkwardly, their back or arm numbs, if they feed lying down, it usually “hangs” over the child on the elbow, the elbow and back become numb. Moreover, if the child does not take the breast well, it hurts the mother ... What kind of pleasure can we talk about here? In the first month - one and a half after childbirth, when the child is applied chaotically, without a pronounced regimen, sucks often and for a long time, the mother can feel good only if breastfeeding is organized correctly, it is convenient for the mother to feed, she knows how to do it standing, lying down and sitting, and even moving.
“After each feeding, you must express the remaining milk, otherwise the milk will be wasted”
No, you do not need to express after each feeding if breastfeeding is properly organized.
If you feed your baby 6 times a day and do not express, indeed, milk can disappear very quickly. If you express after each feeding, then you can support lactation for some time. The terms are different, but rarely it is more than six months, cases of feeding on such behavior for more than a year are rare.
When feeding a baby on demand, the mother always has as much milk as the baby needs and there is no need to pump after each application. In order for the newborn to completely suck out the breast, it is applied to one breast for 2-3 hours, and to the other for the next 2-3 hours. Somewhere after 3 months, when the child is already applied relatively rarely, he may need a second breast in one attachment, then the next time he is applied to the one that was last.
There is one unpleasant “pitfall” in regular pumping after feeding, which even most doctors are not aware of. It's called lactase deficiency. When a mother expresses after a feed, she expresses just the “hind” fatty milk, which is relatively poor in milk sugar, lactose.
She feeds the child mainly with the anterior portion, which accumulates in the breast between rare feedings. There is a lot of lactose in the anterior portion. The child is fed "only lactose", the gastrointestinal tract of the child after some time ceases to cope with such volumes of lactose. Lactase deficiency develops (Lactase is an enzyme that breaks down lactose - milk sugar, it begins to be missed). This is one of the reasons for the development of lactase deficiency; the second, for example, is this: the mother gives the child two breasts in one feeding. But about this separately.
“You should give your baby two breasts at one feeding.”
No, it is not necessary to give two breasts. A newborn baby can be applied for 1.5-3 hours to one breast. Then 1.5-3 hours to another (for example, the baby woke up, sucked a little and didn’t want to anymore, but after 30 minutes he wanted to suck a little more. After 20 minutes, he sucked longer and fell asleep; all these attachments were from one breast; when the baby wakes up, you can offer him another breast).
We need this so that the baby sucks the breast to the end, and receives "front" and "hind" milk in a balanced amount. If the baby is transferred to the other breast in the middle of feeding, he will receive less fat-rich hind milk. He will suck mainly the front portion from one breast and add the same from the other. Foremilk is rich in lactose, and after a while the baby can no longer cope with the load of lactose. Lactose intolerance develops.
Transferring a baby from one breast to another can cause hyperlactation in some women, and if the mother also expresses both breasts after each feeding ... There are such mothers. Curtailing excess milk is sometimes more difficult than adding missing ... In some cases, feeding at one feeding from two breasts is necessary to stimulate lactation when there is a shortage of milk. A growing baby, most often after 3-4 months, may need two breasts in one feeding. Then the next application begins with the breast that was last.
“The more liquid you drink, the more milk”
There are mothers who try to drink as much as possible, sometimes up to 5 liters of liquid per day.
And a nursing mother should drink only as much as she wants. By thirst. Mom shouldn't be thirsty. And if water is drunk on purpose, and even more than 3-3.5 liters per day, lactation can begin to be suppressed.
"Sucking a fist is very harmful"
The whole end of pregnancy the child sucked a fist, so he learned to suck. Fist sucking is one of the inborn habits of a newborn. After childbirth, the baby begins to suck on the fist as soon as it enters his mouth. At 3-4 months, the fist is the first thing that the baby can put into his mouth on his own. He can do things on his own!!! This is amazing! And at this age, many babies begin to actively suck their fingers and fists. There is nothing wrong with this. Mom only needs to watch the baby a little. If a baby plays with a fist, then he sucks, then he stops, he can not be distracted from this activity. If the baby begins to actively suck the fist, then the baby wants to suck for real, offer him a breast. If the need to suckle the baby is fully satisfied by the breast, then the baby stops sucking the fist by 5-6 months.
(Then, at 6-7 months, he begins to “look for teeth”, but this is a completely different behavior). The cam baby sucks almost the same as the breast, opening its mouth wide. Some babies have a very funny behavior when, having stuck to the chest, the baby tries to put his fist in his mouth ...
“My baby needs a pacifier”
The baby is not designed by nature to suckle anything other than the breast (and fist, in a pinch). A child is always taught to use a pacifier. There are children who immediately push out the pacifier with their tongue. And there are those who begin to suck it. There are mothers who hold the pacifier with their finger so that her child does not push it out. Usually, the first time a baby gets a dummy is when he showed concern and the mother does not know how to calm him down. To calm down, the child needs to suck on the breast, well, they didn’t give him a breast, they gave him something else, he will have to suck what they give ...
“A child often asks for breasts, which means he is hungry, he has not enough milk”
As mentioned above, a newborn child asks to be breastfed often, not at all because he is hungry.
He wants to suck, he wants to mom. He constantly needs confirmation of psycho-emotional and physical contact with his mother.
“Sufficient milk or not, we will find out on control feeding”
We will not learn anything on control feeding (the child is weighed before and after feeding, the difference is calculated and find out how much he sucked for feeding). Because:
- A baby who feeds on demand constantly sucks different portions of milk. In one application 5 ml, in another - 50, in the third - 150. You can get 5 ml. (Once I weighed my daughter after 30 minutes of suckling. She gained 14 g. In the first month of her life, she gained 1200 g - and what would the local pediatrician tell me if this was control feeding in the clinic?)
- The newborn is designed to receive small portions of milk, but often. The vast majority of newborns in the conditions of feeding 6-7 times a day still suck out small portions of milk, and not 6 times 120 ml. And of course they don't eat.
They start gaining poorly or stop gaining weight, or lose weight altogether.
Sufficient or not enough milk can be determined in two ways:
Wet diaper test. (This is a test for wet diapers, not for used diapers, because you need to know exactly the number of urination). If a child older than 7 days pees more than 6-8 times a day, his urine is light, transparent, odorless, then he receives a sufficient amount of milk. Usually the child pees during wakefulness every 15-30 minutes. If a mother uses diapers, but wants to find out if there is enough milk or not, she needs to remove the diapers from the child for three hours. If the baby pees 3-4 times or more in three hours, then you can not count further. If you peed 3 times or less, we count for 6 hours. If in six hours he peed 4-5 times or more, you can not count further, if less than 4, we count further. And so on… Weekly weight gain (for a child older than 7 days) should be between 125 and 500 g.
“If applied frequently, the baby will suck everything out quickly, the breast is soft all the time – there is no milk.
It is necessary to “save” milk for feeding”
When feeding a child on demand, the breast becomes soft about a month after the start of feeding, when lactation becomes stable. Milk begins to be produced only when the baby suckles. The breast is never “empty”, in response to the sucking of the child, milk is constantly produced in it. If the mother is trying to fill her breasts for feeding, waiting for the breasts to “fill up”, she gradually reduces the amount of milk by such actions. The more mother attaches the child, the more milk, and not vice versa.
“The stomach needs to rest”
But the child's stomach doesn't work very well. Milk there only curdles and is quickly evacuated to the intestines, where the actual digestion and absorption takes place. This is the prejudice from the old song about feeding according to the schedule after 3 hours. The newborn does not have a clock. No mammal makes even intervals in feeding its newborns. The body of the child is adapted to the continuous flow of mother's milk, and he does not need to rest at all.
“After each feeding, keep the baby upright for 20 minutes”
Do not hold the baby upright after each feeding, especially if the baby has fallen asleep. Most of the time the baby lies on its side. If he burps a little, then the diaper just changes under his cheek. It is necessary to hold the artificial man vertically so that he does not spill the 120g poured into him. And we are talking about babies who are fed on demand and receive small portions of mother's milk. In addition, the cardiac sphincter of the stomach needs training, which it can only receive if the child is lying down.
“You need to sleep at night”
At night, you need to not only sleep, but suck your breast. Most newborn children are so arranged that they sleep from 10-11 pm to 3-4 am, then they begin to wake up and ask for breasts. In a child of the first month of life, applications in the morning hours (from 3 to 8) are usually 4-6. Night feedings with properly organized breastfeeding look something like this: the baby got worried, the mother put it to the breast, the baby sleeps sucking and the mother also sleeps, after a while he lets go of the breast and sleeps more soundly.
And such episodes happen in a night 4-6. All this is easy to organize if the mother sleeps with her child, and for this she needs to be able to feed lying down in a comfortable position.
If the baby sleeps separately from the mother, in his own bed, then he stops waking up for morning feeds, sometimes already a week after birth, sometimes by 1.5-2 months. Most modern mothers take this with relief, because. for them, finally, the night running back and forth, nodding while sitting in a chair or on a bed over a sucking child, and some also pumped at night ... And here they are waiting for a pitfall called insufficient stimulation of prolactin and, as a result, a decrease in the amount of milk . A mother and her child are a wonderful self-regulating system. While the baby has a need to suck in the morning, his mother produces the maximum amount of prolactin, just from about 3 to 8 in the morning.
Prolactin is always present in the female body in small amounts, its concentration in the blood increases significantly after the baby begins to breastfeed, most of all it is obtained in the morning hours from 3 to 8 in the morning.
Prolactin, which appeared in the morning, is engaged in the production of milk during the day. It turns out who sucks at night, stimulates his mother's prolactin and provides himself with a decent amount of milk during the day. And whoever fails to suckle at night, he can quite quickly be left without milk during the day. No mammal takes a nightly break from feeding its young.
“I lost my milk because of my “nerves”
Milk production depends on the hormone prolactin, the amount of which depends on the number of times the baby is latched on and nothing else. The experiences of the mother on any occasion do not affect him. But the release of milk from the breast depends on the hormone oxytocin, which is engaged in the fact that it contributes to the contraction of muscle cells around the lobules of the gland and thereby contributes to the flow of milk. The amount of this hormone is very dependent on the psychological state of the woman. If she is frightened, tired, in pain or in any other discomfort during feeding, oxytocin stops working and milk stops flowing from the breast.
A child cannot suck it out, a breast pump does not express it, and it cannot come out with its hands ...
The manifestation of the “oxytocin reflex” was observed by every breastfeeding woman: when a mother hears the crying of a child (and not necessarily her own), her milk begins to leak. The body tells the mother that it is time to apply the baby. In a situation of stress or fear, nothing like this is observed. (Relationship to the ancient instinct of self-preservation: if a woman runs from a tiger and she smells of leaking milk, the tiger will find and eat her faster, so while she runs in fear through the jungle with a child under her arm, the milk will not leak when she gets to the safety of the cave - and calmly settle down to feed the child, the milk will come again.)
Modern stressful situations work like those tigers. In order for milk to flow out again, you must try to relax during feeding, think only about the child. You can drink soothing herbs, shoulder massage, calm conversation helps well.
Anything to help you relax. And most modern mothers are not able to relax during feeding, it is uncomfortable for them to sit or lie down, it can be painful to feed - all this prevents the manifestation of the oxytocin reflex - milk remains in the breast, which leads to a decrease in lactation.
"Baby too fat, should limit feedings and give water"
Breastfed baby gains 125 to 500g per week, or 500 to 2000g per month. Usually, by 6 months, a child born with a weight of 3-3.5 kg weighs about 8 kg. The rate of gain is very individual, there is never any talk of "overfeeding", children who are actively gaining weight grow rapidly in length and look proportionate. Children who gain 1.5-2 kg per month in the first half of life, usually sharply reduce weight gain in the second half of the year and can weigh 12-14 kg by the year. There is never a need to limit the number of feedings, much less to give water.
“Baby lacks nutrients, needs complementary foods from the age of 4 months”
The need for other food manifests itself in a child of about 6 months of age, when he begins to actively wonder what everyone is eating there.
And if a mother takes a baby to the table with her, he begins to actively take an interest in the contents of his plate. This behavior is called active food interest, and it indicates that the child is ready to get acquainted with new food and can begin it. Nevertheless, breast milk remains the main food of the child in the first year of life, and in many cases even at the beginning of the second, contains absolutely all the nutrients the child needs and much more.
“A breastfeeding mother should have a strict diet”
Food should be habitual. It is preferable not to use exotic foods in the diet that are not characteristic of the "native" climatic zone. A breastfeeding mother may have interesting nutritional needs, and they must be met in the same way as the desires of a pregnant woman. A woman should eat according to her appetite, and not stick food for two into herself. And, of course, you need to try to eat healthy food. Do not use products containing preservatives, dyes and other unhealthy substances.
